thou not capable of,
unrelenting persecutor as thou art!

I sat ruminating, when I had a little come to myself, upon the terms of
this wicked letter; and had no inclination to look into my own. The
bad names, fool's play-thing, artful creature, painted bauble, gewgaw,
speaking picture, are hard words for your poor Pamela! and I began to
think whether I was not indeed a very naughty body, and had not done
vile things: But when I thought of his having discovered poor John, and
of Sir Simon's base officiousness, in telling him of Mr. Williams, with
what he had resolved against him in revenge for his goodness to me, I
was quite dispirited; and yet still more about that fearful Colbrand,
and what he could see done to me: for then I was ready to gasp for
breath, and my heart quite failed me. Then how dreadful are the words,
that he will decide my fate in three weeks! Gracious Heaven, said I,
strike me dead, before that time, with a thunderbolt, or provide some
way for my escaping these threatened mischiefs! God forgive me, if I
sinned!

At last, I took up the letter directed for Mrs. Jewkes, but designed
for me; and I find that little better than the other. These are the hard
terms it contains:

'Well have you done, perverse, forward, artful, yet foolish Pamela,
to convince me, before it was too late, how ill I had done to place my
affections on so unworthy an object: I had vowed honour and love to your
unworthiness, believing you a mirror of bashful modesty and unspotted
innocence; and that no perfidious designs lurked in so fair a bosom. But
now I have found you out, you specious hypocrite! and I see, that though
you could not repose the least confidence in one you had known for
years, and who, under my good mother's misplaced favour for you, had
grown up in a manner with you; when my passion, in spite of my pride,
and the difference of our condition, made me stoop to a meanness that
now I despise myself for; yet you could enter into an intrigue with a
man you never knew till within these few days past, and resolve to run
away with a stranger, whom your fair face, and insinuating arts, had
bewitched to break through all the ties of honour and gratitude to me,
even at a time when the happiness of his future life depended upon my
favour.

'Henceforth, for Pamela's sake, whenever I see a lovely face, will
I mistrust a deceitful heart; and whenever I hear of the greatest
pretences to innocence, will I suspect some deep-l