ST (a little piqued, and deserting the footstool). Had a very tiring
day also, Mary?
LADY MARY (yawning). Dreadfully. Been trying on engagement-rings all the
morning.
ERNEST (who is as fond of gossip as the oldest club member). What's
that? (To AGATHA.) Is it Brocklehurst?
(The energetic AGATHA nods.)
You have given your warm young heart to Brocky?
(LADY MARY is impervious to his humour, but he continues bravely.)
I don't wish to fatigue you, Mary, by insisting on a verbal answer, but
if, without straining yourself, you can signify Yes or No, won't you
make the effort?
(She indolently flashes a ring on her most important finger, and he
starts back melodramatically.)
The ring! Then I am too late, too late! (Fixing LADY MARY sternly, like
a prosecuting counsel.) May I ask, Mary, does Brocky know? Of course,
it was that terrible mother of his who pulled this through. Mother does
everything for Brocky. Still, in the eyes of the law you will be,
not her wife, but his, and, therefore, I hold that Brocky ought to be
informed. Now--
(He discovers that their languorous eyes have closed.)
If you girls are shamming sleep in the expectation that I shall awaken
you in the manner beloved of ladies, abandon all such hopes.
(CATHERINE and AGATHA look up without speaking.)
LADY MARY (speaking without looking up). You impertinent boy.
ERNEST (eagerly plucking another epigram from his quiver). I knew that
was it, though I don't know everything. Agatha, I'm not young enough to
know everything.
(He looks hopefully from one to another, but though they try to grasp
this, his brilliance baffles them.)
AGATHA (his secret admirer). Young enough?
ERNEST (encouragingly). Don't you see? I'm not young enough to know
everything.
AGATHA. I'm sure it's awfully clever, but it's so puzzling.
(Here CRICHTON ushers in an athletic, pleasant-faced young clergyman,
MR. TREHERNE, who greets the company.)
CATHERINE. Ernest, say it to Mr. Treherne.
ERNEST. Look here, Treherne, I'm not young enough to know everything.
TREHERNE. How do you mean, Ernest?
ERNEST. (a little nettled). I mean what I say.
LADY MARY. Say it again; say it more slowly.
ERNEST. I'm--not--young--enough--to--know--everything.
TREHERNE. I see. What you really mean, my boy, is that you are not old
enough to know everything.
ERNEST. No, I don't.
TREHERNE. I assure you that's it.
LADY MARY. Of course it is.
CATHERINE. Yes, Ernest
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