nd a pig would not have these
memories to haunt him, these recollections of a time so different that I
am almost driven wild."

Roseleaf felt a sincere pity for the unfortunate gentleman, and did not
see the slightest element of humor in his melancholy recital. But Archie
Weil could not be restrained.

"You're right about that pig business," he remarked. "You recall the
incident in Mother Goose, where--

'A little pig found a fifty dollar note,
And purchased a hat and a very fine coat.'

"There are strange parallels in history."

Mr. Boggs would have replied to this remark in the terms it deserved had
he not been too much engaged at the moment in masticating a particularly
fine chop. As it was he growled over the meat like a mastiff in bad
humor.

"Are there no remedies for excessive accumulation of fat in the
abdominal region?" asked Weil, taking his advantage. "It seems to me I
have read advertisements of them in the newspapers."

"Remedies!" retorted the other, having swallowed the food and
supplemented it with a glass of ale. "There are a thousand, and I have
tried them all. I have taken things by the gross. I have paid money to
every quack I could find. For awhile I starved myself so nearly to death
that I went to making my will. And every day I grew stouter. I don't
know what I measure now, and I don't care. A few fathoms more or less,
doesn't count, when one falls from a steamer in midocean."

Mr. Weil took occasion to say that there was no need for this extreme
discouragement. A little coin in the hand, or a new diamond ring, would
still bring youth and beauty to his disconsolate friend.

"That's just it," retorted Boggs. "It's the contrast that's killing me.
The only women who would look at me to-day are mercenary ones that
wouldn't care if I was black as Othello or big as George IV. Why, I
could show you a trunkful of letters, written me by the finest women in
this country, when I was at my best. They breathe but one thing--love,
love, love! I lived on it! It was the air that kept my lungs in motion.
And I thought to go back to it so easily! _Ah!_"

Mr. Boggs commenced upon his fourth chop and emptied the last of the
quart bottle into his glass.

"Well, I'm sorry for you," said Weil. "I think the times must have
changed, as well as yourself, though. Now, here's a young fellow, with
all the qualifications of face, figure and address that you once had,
and he claims to be unable to make the