ect in American Manners. Coldness and
Reserve of the Descendants of the Puritans accounted for. Cause of
the Want of Courtesy in American Manners. Want of Discrimination.
Difference of Principles regulating Aristocratic and Democratic
Manners. Rules for regulating the Courtesies founded on Precedence
of Age, Office, and Station, in a Democracy. Manners appropriate to
Superiors and Subordinates. Miss Martineau's Remarks on the
Universal Practice of Americans to give Precedence to Woman.
Peculiar Defect of Americans in this Respect. This to be remedied
in the Domestic Circle, alone. Rules of Precedence to be enforced
in the Family. Manners and Tones towards Superiors to be regulated
in the Family. Treatment of grown Brothers and Sisters by Young
Children. Acknowledgement of Favors by Children to be required.
Children to ask leave or apologize in certain Cases. Rules for
avoiding Remarks that wound the Feelings of Others. Rules of
Hospitality. Conventional Rules. Rules for Table Manners. Caution
as to teaching these Rules to Children. Caution as to Allowances to
be made for those deficient in Good-manners. Comparison of English
and American Manners, by De Tocqueville. America may hope to excel
all Nations in Refinement, Taste, and Good-breeding; and why.
Effects of Wealth and Equalisation of Labor. Allusion to the
Manners of Courts in the past Century, 136

CHAPTER XIII.

ON THE PRESERVATION OF A GOOD TEMPER IN A HOUSEKEEPER.

Influence of a Housekeeper on Domestic Happiness. Contrasts to
illustrate. Sympathy. Influence of Tones. Allowances to be made for
Housekeepers. Considerations to aid in regulating Temper and Tones.
First; Her Duties to be regarded as Dignified, Important, and
Difficult. Second; She should feel that she really has Great
Difficulties to meet and overcome. Third; She should deliberately
calculate upon having her Plans interfered with, and be prepared
for the Emergency. Fourth; All her Plans should be formed
consistently with the Means at Command. Fifth; System, Economy, and
Neatness, only valuable when they tend to promote the Comfort and
Well-being of the Family. Sixth; Government of Tones of Voice. Some
Persons think Angry Tones needful. They mistake. Illustration.
Scolding, Unlady-like, and in Bad Taste. A Forgiving Spirit
necessary. Seventh and Last Consideration offered; Right View of a
Superintending Providence. Fretfulness and Complaining sinful, 148