n
in these days, precious material to make play from. Even
Jack's culpable vagaries, if reproduced in anything like
original form, might be utilised to entertaining effect; but
the professional person insists upon making him appear with
a quid rolling about in his mouth and his stomach brimful
of slang, which he empties as occasion may require. It may
or may not go down with their audiences, but the tar himself
cannot stand it. I was seated beside a typical sailor in a
London theatre not very long ago, and a few gentlemen in
nautical attire came one after the other strutting on to the
stage. Their performances were quite unsailorly, so much so
that my neighbour said to me: "If this goes on much longer I
shall have to go. Just fancy," said he, "a matter-of-fact
sailor making such a d----fool of himself!" I reminded him
that this achievement was not so rare an occurrence. But he
was not to be appeased! The sailor of the olden times never
used tinsel nautical terms. His dialect was straight and
strong, and his peculiar dandyism very funny. His hair used
to be combed behind his ears, he wore a broad, flat cap
cocked to one side, and his ears were adorned with light
drops of gold or silver; and when he went forth to do his
courting he seemed to be vastly puzzled as to the form his
walk should take. Alas! all this has passed away, and our
eyes shall see it never more; but the fascination of it is
fixed in one's memory, and it is pleasant to think of even
now.

The average seaman has always expressed himself with
unmistakable clearness on matters pertaining to his
profession. I was walking down the main street of a
seafaring town some years ago, when I saw a group of people
standing at a window looking at an oil-painting of a large,
square-rigged ship which had been caught in a squall. The
royals and top-gallant sails had been let fly, and they were
supposed to be flapping about as sails will in a squall if
the yards are not trimmed so as to keep them quiet. There
were two sailors in the group who were criticising the
painting with some warmth: the ropes were not as they should
be, the braces and stays were not properly regulated, and
"Whoever saw sails flying about like that!" said the more
voluble of the two. The other dryly retorted, "I don't know,
mister, what _you_ think, but I want to say that I have seen
them cut some d---- funny capers at times!" This very
sailor-like sally both tickled the audience and convince