and
cannot describe my temper: I could ill reassume the first penitence
which I had so apparently trampled upon, and hardened myself against: I
thought the bitterness of death had been past, and that this would be
nothing like the first: but when the master himself came by me, as I
said just now, and said we should be all lost, I was dreadfully
frighted: I got up out of my cabin, and looked out; but such a dismal
sight I never saw; the sea went mountains high, and broke upon us every
three or four minutes: when I could look about, I could see nothing but
distress round us: two ships that rid near us, we found, had cut their
masts by the board, being deep loaden; and our men cried out, that a
ship which rid about a mile ahead of us was foundered. Two more ships
being driven from their anchors, were run out of the roads to sea, at
all adventures, and that with not a mast standing. The light ships fared
the best, as not so much labouring in the sea; but two or three of them
drove, and came close by us, running away with only their sprit-sail out
before the wind.

Towards evening the mate and boatswain begged the master of our ship to
let them cut away the fore-mast, which he was very unwilling to do: but
the boatswain protesting to him, that if he did not, the ship would
founder, he consented; and when they had cut away the fore-mast, the
main-mast stood so loose, and shook the ship so much, they were obliged
to cut her away also, and make a clear deck.

Any one may judge what a condition I must be in at all this, who was but
a young sailor, and who had been in such a fright before at but a
little. But if I can express at this distance the thoughts I had about
me at that time, I was in tenfold more horror of mind upon account of my
former convictions, and the having returned from them to the resolutions
I had wickedly taken at first, than I was at death itself; and these,
added to the terror of the storm, put me in such a condition, that I can
by no words describe it. But the worst was not come yet; the storm
continued with such fury, that the seamen themselves acknowledged they
had never known a worse. We had a good ship, but she was deep loaden,
and wallowed in the sea, that the seamen every now and then cried out,
she would founder. It was my advantage in one respect, that I did not
know what they meant by founder till I inquired. However, the storm was
so violent, that I saw what is not often seen, the master, the
b