Snutch that he had a weak
heart and Snutch, taking stock of Davenant, prudently forbore to demand
a doctor's certificate. Chard magnificently refused to go near the
river and was henceforward ignored by the college athletes: but he did
not mind, for none of them had votes at the Union.

"The thing for us," suggested Lawrence to Martin and Rendell, "is that
what-you-may-call-'em strike. Greve perle or something or other. Stay
in and rot the show. Catch a crab every other minute."

"How does one catch a crab?" asked Rendell, but no one could tell him.

Like most of Lawrence's intentions (he was rich in schemes), the idea
was never put into practice. What eventually occurred was the
appearance of the rugger secretary demanding the assistance of Lawrence
'just to stiffen up his pack' and the speedy release of Martin and
Rendell owing to their dismal inefficiency. Snutch was entirely
charming and Martin, who had feared a terrific, blustering coach, was
agreeably surprised at the experience.

Another point of agreement with the Push was the essential loathliness
of Hearties. King's had rather more than its fair share of Hearties
and the freshers seemed likely to keep up the supply. All Hearties
were religious, but all the religious were not Hearties. The Hearties
always shouted at one another in the quad, and banged each other on the
back. They always called each other Tom and Bill, and when they were
not back-banging, they were making arrangements for mission work. They
did much solid work for the college athletics, took seconds and thirds
in history, and afterwards became schoolmasters and parsons and went to
Switzerland in the winter.

Rendell, who had a passion for classification, insisted on
distinguishing between neo-cardiacs and palaeo-cardiacs.
"Neo-cardiacs," he said, "are more spiritual and more dangerous. They
don't shout like the whole-hoggers, but their eyes glitter more and
they're keener about the new type of bishop. Look at Steel-Brockley.
He's a scholar and a 'mind' and can't swallow all the rot of the old
school, but he's more sinister really."

"I suppose that Hodges is the ideal palaeo-cardiac," said Martin.

"Yes, Hodges, the great ass."

"Of course he's out to set up a kingdom of heaven upon earth," said
Lawrence. "And can't you imagine his idea of it? It'll be stiff with
people like himself, all blustering round and organising things.
Football, Rich _v._ Poor. Of course there wi