heart and
force tears from the eyes of a stock-broker,--I, I say, had to stand
there and listen in silence! Watching a creature banging away at a
target that he never hit, with an old flint musket, while you held in
your hand a short Enfield that would have driven the ball through the
bull's eye, is nothing to this; and to tell the truth, it nearly choked
me. Twice I had to cough down the words, "Now let me mention a personal
fact." But I did succeed, and I am proud to say I only grew very red in
the face, and felt that singing noise in the ears and general state of
muddle that forebodes a fit. But I rallied, and said in a voice, slow
from the dignity of a self-conquest,--

"Can you take me as a passenger to Constantinople?"

"To Constantinople? Ay, to the Persian Gulf, to Point de Galle, to
Cochin China, to Ross River; don't think to puzzle me with navigation,
my lad."

"Are there many other passengers?"

"I could have five hundred, if I 'd take 'em! Put Bob Rogers on a
placard, and see what'll happen. If I said, 'I 'm a-going to sea on a
plank to-morrow,' there's men would rather come along with me than go in
the 'Queen' or the 'Hannibal.' I don't say they 're right, mind ye; but
I won't say they's wrong, neither."

"Oh, why did n't I meet this wretch when I was a child? Why didn't my
father find a Helot like this, to tell lies before me, and frighten me
with their horrid ugliness?" This was the thought that flashed through
me as I listened. I felt, besides, that such stupid, purposeless
inventions corrupted and blunted the taste for graceful narrative, just
in the same way that an undeserving recipient of charity offends the
pleasure of real benevolence.

"May I ask, Captain Rogers, what is the fare?" said I, with a bland
courtesy.

"That depends upon the man, sir. If you was Ramsam Can-tanker-abad, I'd
say five hundred gold pagodas. If you was a Cockney stripling, with a
fresh-water face, and a spunyarn whisker, I 'd call it a matter of seven
or eight pound."

"And you sail at eight?"

"To the minute. When Bob Rogers says eight o'clock, the first turn of
the paddles will be the first stroke of the hour."

"Then book me, pray, for a berth; and, for surety's sake, I'll go aboard
to-night!"

"Meet me, then, here, at ten o'clock, and I 'll take you off in my gig,
an honor to be proud on, my lad; but as Joe's friend, I'll do it."

I bowed my acknowledgments and went off, neither delighted with my new
ac