they wus up in them swings they wus nearer
Heavun un they'll ever git again."

Aaron Todd pushed his whiskers over the garden fence, inquiring of Lin
as to Alfred's condition: "He's purty badly hurt I fear," he began, and,
with a tone that betokened anything but sympathy: "Hurt internally I
reckon. He'll hardly pull through ef he hes blood pizening; I never
knowed anybody thet hed hit internally thet evur got up again."

"Oh, my!" and Lin pretended to be greatly surprised, "Oh, my, Alfurd's
all right. Why he's up an' about. Ef you're goin' out on a torch-lite
percession soon ye'll hear from him." Todd's face clouded, pulling his
whiskers over the fence into his own yard, muttered: "The luck of sum
peepul beats hell."

The doctor and Jack arrived. "What kind of liniment did you apply to
Alfred's bruises?" sternly demanded the doctor.

"I dunno," quietly answered Jack, "your liniment I reckon."

[Illustration: "And Thar's the Very Bottle"]

"Was there turpentine in the liniment you used?" continued the doctor,
not regarding Jack's reply.

"Well I should say; hit nearly burnt my han' off, hit tuk all the skin
off twixt the fingers; my han' wus jus' like when I hed the itch. I've
been greasin' hit with hog's lard an' elder bark ever since," and Jack
pulled his hand out of his pocket and held it up to the doctor's view.

The doctor bent over the hand; it was discolored with small blackish
spots. "Where did you get the liniment; did you bring it with you?" more
sternly demanded the doctor.

"No, sir, I didn't bring hit with me," somewhat impudently answered
Jack, "I'm no hopathekary; I got the liniment right thar," pointing to
the closet door, "an' thar's the very bottle," continued Jack as he
opened the closet door.

Taking the large bottle off the shelf with both hands he passed it to
the doctor who shook and uncorked it. As he was in the act of smelling
it the father entered the room. Turning toward him the doctor, with his
nose still at the neck of the bottle, inquired: "John, where did you get
this stuff, this liniment?"

"Liniment?" the father repeated, as he reached for the bottle.
"Liniment? Why, doc, that's not liniment. Who said it was? Why, I've
been experimenting with that stuff nearly a year. That's not liniment,
thet's walnut stain; I can stain anything to resemble walnut. We--"

The remainder of the father's recommendation was lost in the laugh.
Alfred kicked the bedclothes over the headboard; the