e called on Dean Swift on his
return from London, dressed in a rich coat of silk brocade and gold
lace, and seeming not a little proud of the adorning of his person: the
Dean determined to humble him. When he entered the room, and saluted the
Dean with all the respectful familiarity of an old acquaintance, the
Dean affected not to know him; in vain did he declare himself as George
Faulkner, the Dublin printer; the Dean declared him an impostor, and at
last abruptly bade him begone. Faulkner, perceiving the error he had
committed, instantly returned home, and resuming his usual dress, again
went to the Dean, when he was very cordially received. "Ah, George,"
said he, "I am so glad to see you, for here has been an impudent
coxcomb, bedizened in silks and gold lace, who wanted to pass himself
off for you; but I soon sent the fellow about his business; for I knew
you to be _always_ a plain dressed and honest man, just as you now
appear before me."

SWIFT, ARBUTHNOT, AND PARNELL.

Swift, Arbuthnot, and Parnell, taking the advantage of a fine frosty
morning, set out together upon a walk to a little place which Lord
Bathurst had, about eleven miles from London. Swift, remarkable for
being an old traveller, and for getting possession of the best rooms and
warmest beds, pretended, when they were about half way, that he did not
like the slowness of their pace; adding, that he would walk on before
them, and acquaint his lordship with their journey. To this proposal
they readily agreed; but as soon as he was out of sight, sent off a
horseman by a private way (suspecting their friend's errand), to inform
his lordship of their apprehensions. The man arrived in time enough to
deliver his message before Swift made his appearance. His lordship then
recollecting that the dean never had the small-pox, thought of the
following stratagem. Seeing him coming up the avenue, he ran out to meet
him, and expressed his happiness at the sight of him. "But I am
mortified at one circumstance," continued his lordship, "as it must
deprive me of the pleasure of your company; there is a raging small-pox
in the house: I beg, however, that you will accept of such accommodation
as a small house at the bottom of the avenue can afford you." Swift was
forced to comply with this request: and in this solitary situation,
fearful of speaking to any person around him, he was served with dinner.
In the evening, the wits thought proper to release him, by going dow