t, however, and called again. "I asked Madam what
fashioned neck-lace I should present her with; she said none at
all"[246] Evidently such coolness chilled the ardor of his devotion, and
he records but one more visit of a courting nature. "Give her the
remnant of my almonds; she did not eat of them as before; but laid them
away.... The fire was come to one short brand besides the block ... at
last it fell to pieces, and no recruit was made." The judge took the
hint. "Took leave of her.... Treated me courteously.... Told her she had
enter'd the 4th year of widowhood.... Her dress was not so clean as
sometime it had been. Jehovah jireh."[247]

A little later he turned his attention toward a Mrs. Ruggles; but by
this time the Judge was known as a persistent suitor, and one hard to
discourage, and it would seem that Mrs. Ruggles gave him no opportunity
to push the matter. At length, however, he found his heart's desire in a
Mrs. Gibbs and, judging from his _Diary_, was exceedingly pleased with
his choice.

_III. Liberty to Choose_

It seems clear that the virgin, as well as the widow, was given
considerable liberty in making up her own mind as to the choice of a
life mate, and any general conclusions that colonial women were
practically forced into uncongenial marriages by the command of parents
has no documentary evidence whatever. For instance, Eliza Pinckney wrote
in reply to her father's inquiry about her marriageable possibilities:

"As you propose Mr. L. to me I am sorry I can't have Sentiments
favourable enough to him to take time to think on the Subject, as
your Indulgence to me will ever add weight to the duty that
obliges me to consult that best pleases you, for so much
Generosity on your part claims all my Obedience. But as I know
'tis my Happiness you consult, I must beg the favour of you to
pay my compliments to the old Gentleman for his Generosity and
favorable Sentiments of me, and let him know my thoughts on the
affair in such civil terms as you know much better than I can
dictate; and beg leave to say to you that the riches of Chili and
Peru put together, if he had them could not purchase a sufficient
Esteem for him to make him my husband.

"As to the other Gentleman you mention, Mr. W., you know, sir, I
have so slight a knowledge of him I can form no judgment, and a
case of such consequence requires the nicest distinction of