ed. The mind of man is so strangely formed that, with what he sees
and in spite of what he sees, he can conjure up a hundred objects of woe.
In truth his brain resembles the dungeons of the Inquisition, where the
walls are covered with so many instruments of torture that one is dazed,
and asks whether these horrible contrivances he sees before him are
pincers or playthings. Tell me, I say, what difference is there in saying
to my mistress: "All women deceive," or, "You deceive me?"

What passed through my mind was perhaps as subtle as the finest
sophistry; it was a sort of dialogue between the mind and the conscience.
"If I should lose Brigitte?" I said to the mind. "She departs with you,"
said the conscience. "If she deceives me?"--"How can she deceive you? Has
she not made out her will asking for prayers for you?"--"If Smith loves
her?"--"Fool! What does it matter so long as you know that she loves
you?"--"If she loves me why is she sad?"--"That is her secret, respect
it."--"If I take her away with me, will she be happy?"--"Love her and she
will be."--"Why, when that man looks at her, does she seem to fear to
meet his glance?"--"Because she is a woman and he is young."--"Why does
that young man turn pale when she looks at him?"--"Because he is a man
and she is beautiful."--"Why, when I went to see him did he throw himself
into my arms, and why did he weep and beat his head with his hands?"--"Do
not seek to know what you must remain ignorant of."--"Why can I not know
these things?"--"Because you are miserable and weak, and all mystery is
of God."

"But why is it that I suffer? Why is it that my soul recoils in
terror?"--"Think of your father and do good."--"But why am I unable to do
as he did? Why does evil attract me to itself?"--"Get down on your knees
and confess; if you believe in evil it is because your ways have been
evil."--"If my ways were evil, was it my fault? Why did the good betray
me?"--"Because you are in the shadow, would you deny the existence of
light? If there are traitors, why are you one of them?"--"Because I am
afraid of becoming the dupe."--"Why do you spend your nights in watching?
Why are you alone now?"--"Because I think, I doubt, and I fear."--"When
will you offer your prayer?"--"When I believe. Why have they lied to
me?"--"Why do you lie, coward! at this very moment? Why not die if you
can not suffer?"

Thus spoke and groaned within me two voices, voices that were defiant and
terrible; and