and sugar, bearing upon its reverse surface the
simple words, 'I love you!' I have since ascertained that these disks
may be bought for five cents a dozen--or at considerably less than one
half cent for the single lozenge. Yes, gentlemen, the words 'I love
you!'--the oldest legend of all; the refrain 'when the morning
stars sang together'--were presented to the plaintiff by a medium so
insignificant that there is, happily, no coin in the republic low enough
to represent its value.
"I shall prove to you, gentlemen of the jury," said the Colonel
solemnly, drawing a Bible from his coat-tail pocket, "that the defendant
for the last twelve months conducted an amatory correspondence with
the plaintiff by means of underlined words of Sacred Writ and church
psalmody, such as 'beloved,' 'precious,' and 'dearest,' occasionally
appropriating whole passages which seemed apposite to his tender
passion. I shall call your attention to one of them. The defendant,
while professing to be a total abstainer,--a man who, in my own
knowledge, has refused spirituous refreshment as an inordinate weakness
of the flesh,--with shameless hypocrisy underscores with his pencil the
following passage, and presents it to the plaintiff. The gentlemen of
the jury will find it in the Song of Solomon, page 548, chapter ii.
verse 5." After a pause, in which the rapid rustling of leaves was heard
in the jury-box, Colonel Starbottle declaimed in a pleading, stentorian
voice, "'Stay me with--er--FLAGONS, comfort me with--er--apples--for
I am--er--sick of love.' Yes, gentlemen!--yes, you may well turn
from those accusing pages and look at the double-faced defendant. He
desires--to--er--be--'stayed with flagons'! I am not aware at present
what kind of liquor is habitually dispensed at these meetings, and for
which the defendant so urgently clamored; but it will be my duty, before
this trial is over, to discover it, if I have to summon every barkeeper
in this district. For the moment I will simply call your attention to
the QUANTITY. It is not a single drink that the defendant asks for--not
a glass of light and generous wine, to be shared with his inamorata,
but a number of flagons or vessels, each possibly holding a pint
measure--FOR HIMSELF!"
The smile of the audience had become a laugh. The Judge looked up
warningly, when his eye caught the fact that the Colonel had again
winced at this mirth. He regarded him seriously. Mr. Hotchkiss's counsel
had joined
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