at a funeral in the family, and she
then issued the order, 'Onward!' to the Mendicant's menial.

'I wish to goodness, Ma,' said Lavvy, throwing herself back among the
cushions, with her arms crossed, 'that you'd loll a little.'

'How!' repeated Mrs Wilfer. 'Loll!'

'Yes, Ma.'

'I hope,' said the impressive lady, 'I am incapable of it.'

'I am sure you look so, Ma. But why one should go out to dine with one's
own daughter or sister, as if one's under-petticoat was a blackboard, I
do NOT understand.'

'Neither do I understand,' retorted Mrs Wilfer, with deep scorn, 'how
a young lady can mention the garment in the name of which you have
indulged. I blush for you.'

'Thank you, Ma,' said Lavvy, yawning, 'but I can do it for myself, I am
obliged to you, when there's any occasion.'

Here, Mr Sampson, with the view of establishing harmony, which he never
under any circumstances succeeded in doing, said with an agreeable
smile: 'After all, you know, ma'am, we know it's there.' And immediately
felt that he had committed himself.

'We know it's there!' said Mrs Wilfer, glaring.

'Really, George,' remonstrated Miss Lavinia, 'I must say that I don't
understand your allusions, and that I think you might be more delicate
and less personal.'

'Go it!' cried Mr Sampson, becoming, on the shortest notice, a prey to
despair. 'Oh yes! Go it, Miss Lavinia Wilfer!'

'What you may mean, George Sampson, by your omnibus-driving expressions,
I cannot pretend to imagine. Neither,' said Miss Lavinia, 'Mr George
Sampson, do I wish to imagine. It is enough for me to know in my own
heart that I am not going to--' having imprudently got into a sentence
without providing a way out of it, Miss Lavinia was constrained to
close with 'going to it'. A weak conclusion which, however, derived some
appearance of strength from disdain.

'Oh yes!' cried Mr Sampson, with bitterness. 'Thus it ever is. I
never--'

'If you mean to say,' Miss Lavvy cut him short, that you never brought
up a young gazelle, you may save yourself the trouble, because nobody
in this carriage supposes that you ever did. We know you better.' (As if
this were a home-thrust.)

'Lavinia,' returned Mr Sampson, in a dismal vein, I did not mean to
say so. What I did mean to say, was, that I never expected to retain my
favoured place in this family, after Fortune shed her beams upon it. Why
do you take me,' said Mr Sampson, 'to the glittering halls with which
I can never compe