al piety until twenty years after
she had formally given up the world. Then, saddened and sobered by her
father's death, Teresa began to have wonderful trances, accompanied by
visions wherein Christ, crucified, appeared to her time and time again.
Although in later times these unusual experiences have been adduced to
prove her saintship, at the time of their occurrence they were not
looked upon in the same light, and there were many who said that Teresa
was possessed of devils. She was more than half inclined to this view
of the case herself, and the eminent religious authorities who were
consulted in the matter advised her to scourge herself without mercy,
and to exorcise the figures, both celestial and infernal, which
continued to appear before her. The strange experiences continued to
trouble her, however, in spite of all that she could do, and to the end
of her days she was subject to them. Constantly occupied with illusions
and hallucinations, she soon became a religious mystic, living apart
from the world and yet deeply interested in its spiritual welfare. One
of her visions in particular shows into what a state of religious
exaltation she could be thrown. She imagined herself a frameless mirror
of infinite size, with Christ shining in the middle of it, and the
mirror itself, she knew not how, was in Christ!
In the midst of these experiences Teresa began to wonder what she could
do for the real advancement of the Church, and her first thought was
that there must be reform in the convents if the cause of religion was
to prosper. Discouraged by the members of her own convent, who looked
upon any reform movement as a reflection upon their own establishment,
Teresa was nevertheless encouraged to go on with her work by certain
far-seeing ecclesiastics who were able to appreciate its ultimate value.
It was her plan to establish a convent wherein all the early and austere
regulations of the Carmelite order were to be observed, and, by working
secretly, she was able to carry it out. There was violent protest, which
almost led to violence, and it was only after full papal approval that
she was allowed to go about her business unmolested. The reorganizing
spirit of the Counter-Reformation which was now at work within the
Catholic Church gave her moral support, and the remaining years of her
life were devoted to the work of conventual reorganization and
regeneration which she had begun with so stout a heart. It was her wont
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