, under those
circumstances, she is not to be joked about.

'Dombey,' says the Major, seeing this, 'I give you joy. I congratulate
you, Dombey. By the Lord, Sir,' says the Major, 'you are more to be
envied, this day, than any man in England!'

Here again Mr Dombey's assent is qualified; because he is going to
confer a great distinction on a lady; and, no doubt, she is to be envied
most.

'As to Edith Granger, Sir,' pursues the Major, 'there is not a woman
in all Europe but might--and would, Sir, you will allow Bagstock to
add--and would--give her ears, and her earrings, too, to be in Edith
Granger's place.'

'You are good enough to say so, Major,' says Mr Dombey.

'Dombey,' returns the Major, 'you know it. Let us have no false
delicacy. You know it. Do you know it, or do you not, Dombey?' says the
Major, almost in a passion.

'Oh, really, Major--'

'Damme, Sir,' retorts the Major, 'do you know that fact, or do you not?
Dombey! Is old Joe your friend? Are we on that footing of unreserved
intimacy, Dombey, that may justify a man--a blunt old Joseph B.,
Sir--in speaking out; or am I to take open order, Dombey, and to keep my
distance, and to stand on forms?'

'My dear Major Bagstock,' says Mr Dombey, with a gratified air, 'you are
quite warm.'

'By Gad, Sir,' says the Major, 'I am warm. Joseph B. does not deny it,
Dombey. He is warm. This is an occasion, Sir, that calls forth all the
honest sympathies remaining in an old, infernal, battered, used-up,
invalided, J. B. carcase. And I tell you what, Dombey--at such a time
a man must blurt out what he feels, or put a muzzle on; and Joseph
Bagstock tells you to your face, Dombey, as he tells his club behind
your back, that he never will be muzzled when Paul Dombey is in
question. Now, damme, Sir,' concludes the Major, with great firmness,
'what do you make of that?'

'Major,' says Mr Dombey, 'I assure you that I am really obliged to you.
I had no idea of checking your too partial friendship.'

'Not too partial, Sir!' exclaims the choleric Major. 'Dombey, I deny
it.'

'Your friendship I will say then,' pursues Mr Dombey, 'on any account.
Nor can I forget, Major, on such an occasion as the present, how much I
am indebted to it.'

'Dombey,' says the Major, with appropriate action, 'that is the hand
of Joseph Bagstock: of plain old Joey B., Sir, if you like that better!
That is the hand, of which His Royal Highness the late Duke of York, did
me the honour to obse