in this blind, aloof way--this thing that is my
rival--that stands with its claw embedded in her body warning me back!
The horror of it is in the blind, intangible, abstract force that is
against me. I can't fight it aloof from her; I can't take her away from
it unless I have her in my arms to guard, to inspire, to comfort, to
watch. Can't you see, Kathleen, that I must have her every second of the
time?"
"She will not let you run the risk," murmured Kathleen. "Duane, she had
a dreadful night--she broke down so utterly that it scared me. She is
horribly frightened; her nervous demoralisation is complete. For the
first time, I think, she is really terrified. She says it is hopeless,
that her will and nerve are undermined, her courage contaminated....
Hour after hour I sat with her; she made me tell her about her
grandfather--about what I knew of the--the taint in her family."
"Those things are merely predispositions," he said. "Self-command makes
them harmless."
"I told her that. She says that they are living sparks that will
smoulder while life endures."
"Suppose they are," he said; "they can never flame unless nursed....
Kathleen, I want to see her----"
"She will not."
"Has she spoken at all of me?"
"Yes."
"Bitterly?"
"Y-yes. I don't know what you did. She is very morbid just now, anyway;
very desperate. But I know that, unconsciously, she counts on an
adjustment of any minor personal difficulty with you.... She loves you
dearly, Duane."
He passed an unsteady hand across his eyes.
"She must marry me. I can't stand aloof from this battle any longer."
"Duane, she will not. I--she said some things--she is morbid, I tell
you--and curiously innocent--in her thoughts--concerning herself and
you. She says she can never marry."
"Exactly what did she say to you?"
Kathleen hesitated; the intimacy of the subject left her undecided; then
very seriously her pure, clear gaze met his:
"She will not marry, for your own sake, and for the sake of
any--children. She has evidently thought it all out.... I must tell you
how it is. There is no use in asking her; she will never consent, Duane,
as long as she is afraid of herself. And how to quiet that fear by
exterminating the reason for it I don't know--" Her voice broke
pitifully. "Only stand by us, Duane. Don't go away just now. You were
packing to go; but please don't leave me just yet. Could you arrange to
remain for a while?"
"Yes, I'll arrange i
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