bove the range of little minds,
the trivialities of everyday life, social gossip, and the like, seemed
to shrink from his presence. One always felt the touch of noble thoughts,
and the longing for high endeavor where he was. I lived over again in
these long, quiet drives, with the silent Thomas, those last few months,
when, with my innocent child's heart, I sunned myself in his presence,
unconscious of the rare charm and fascination that drew me to him.

But as I grew stronger I turned from the past and its memories,
bitter-sweet, and set myself resolutely to the duty of living my life
well, independently of its secret unrest and pain. I knew that many
before me, multitudes after me, would be called to endure a like
discipline, and the world, no doubt, is the richer in what it holds as
imperishable because of the compensation suffering brings; for if we take
with a docile mind the discipline God gives, there will always be
compensation. One day, when I had come back strengthened from a long
drive along the seashore, a very pleasant surprise awaited me. Mrs.
Flaxman had received letters from Mr. Winthrop which, to my surprise, she
did not share with me. But she handed me a check for two hundred dollars,
which I was to distribute among my poor friends. That money I believe
helped to change the destinies of several lives: for I tried to lay it
out in a way that would help some to improve their chances to make life
a success.

June, with its flowers and perfumes, came at last; and in the early
morning, when I used to ramble through the stretches of flowers and
shrubbery, and under the trees, tremulous with bird song, I wondered how
the owner of all this beauty could willingly banish himself from it.
Thomas permitted me to gather flowers at will--a favor I used to the
utmost, among others sending Mrs. Le Grande a daily remembrance from
Oaklands, in the shape of a bouquet of the choicest blossoms.

At last I resolved to follow the flowers myself, though at the risk of
the second time incurring Mr. Winthrop's displeasure; but if she were
soon to die, as her attendants seemed to expect, surely here was
missionary work right at my door. I found the cottage a perfect bower of
roses. The garden in front was a wilderness of the choicest varieties I
had ever seen, and in the windows nothing could be seen but green leaves
and blossoms of every varying tint. It seemed hard to believe that the
rarest rose of all was lying there, fadi