tuals and drink amongst those of their
own rank: behold _their_ guardianship of his pork-tub, his bacon rack,
his butter, cheese, milk, poultry, eggs, and all the rest of it: look at
_their_ care of all his household stuff, his blankets, sheets,
pillow-cases, towels, knives and forks, and particularly of his
_crockery ware_, of which last they will hardly exceed a single
cart-load of broken bits in the year. And, how nicely they will get up
and take care of his linen and other wearing apparel, and always have it
ready for him without his thinking about it! If absent at market, or
especially at a distant fair, how scrupulously they will keep all their
cronies out of his house, and what special care they will take of his
_cellar_, more particularly that which holds the strong beer! And his
groceries and his spirits and his _wine_ (for a bachelor can _afford_
it), how safe these will all be! Bachelors have not, indeed, any more
than married men, a security for _health_; but if our young farmer be
sick, there are his couple of maids to take care of him, to administer
his medicine, and to perform for him all other nameless offices, which
in such a case are required; and what is more, take care of every thing
down stairs at the same time, especially his desk with the money in it!
Never will they, good-humoured girls as they are, scold him for coming
home too late; but, on the contrary, like him the better for it; and if
he have drunk a little too much, so much the better, for then he will
sleep late in the morning, and when he comes out at last, he will find
that his men have been _so hard_ at work, and that all his animals have
been taken such good care of!

211. Nonsense! a bare glance at the thing shows, that a farmer, above
all men living, can never carry on his affairs with profit without a
wife, or a mother, or a daughter, or some such person; and _mother_ and
_daughter_ imply matrimony. To be sure, a wife would cause some
_trouble_, perhaps, to this young man. There might be the midwife and
nurse to gallop after at midnight; there might be, and there ought to
be, if called for, a little complaining of late hours; but, good God!
what are these, and all the other _troubles_ that could attend a married
life; what are they, compared to the one single circumstance of the want
of a wife at your bedside during one single night of illness! A nurse!
what is a nurse to do for you? Will she do the things that a wife will
do? Will