ft
in him, and if there be rope or river near, the sooner he betakes him to
the one or the other the better. How many men, how many families, have I
known brought to utter ruin only by the husband suffering himself to be
subdued, to be cowed down, to be held in fear, of even a virtuous wife!
What, then, must be the lot of him who submits to a commander who, at
the same time, sets all virtue at defiance!

185. Women are a _sisterhood_. They make _common cause_ in behalf of the
_sex_; and, indeed, this is natural enough, when we consider the vast
power that the _law_ gives us over them. The law is for us, and they
combine, wherever they can, to mitigate its effects. This is perfectly
natural, and, to a certain extent, laudable, evincing fellow-feeling and
public spirit: but when carried to the length of '_he sha'n't_,' it is
despotism on the one side and slavery on the other. Watch, therefore,
the incipient steps of encroachment; and they come on so slowly, so
softly, that you must be sharp-sighted if you perceive them; but the
moment you _do perceive them_: your love will blind for too long a time;
but the moment you do perceive them, put at once an effectual stop to
their progress. Never mind the pain that it may give you: a day of pain
at this time will spare you years of pain in time to come. Many a man
has been miserable, and made his wife miserable too, for a score or two
of years, only for want of resolution to bear one day of pain: and it is
a great deal to bear; it is a great deal to do to thwart the desire of
one whom you so dearly love, and whose virtues daily render her more and
more dear to you. But (and this is one of the most admirable of the
mother's traits) as she herself will, while the tears stream from her
eyes, force the nauseous medicine down the throat of her child, whose
every cry is a dagger to her heart; as she herself has the courage to do
this for the sake of her child, why should you flinch from the
performance of a still more important and more sacred duty towards
herself, as well as towards you and your children?

186. Am I recommending _tyranny_? Am I recommending _disregard_ of the
wife's opinions and wishes? Am I recommending a _reserve_ towards her
that would seem to say that she was not trust-worthy, or not a party
interested in her husband's affairs? By no means: on the contrary,
though I would keep any thing disagreeable from her, I should not enjoy
the prospect of good without makin