tute for natural
intonation. Then its incapability of sustaining a note has led, as the
only means of producing effect, to those infinitesimal subdivisions of
sound, in which all sentiment and expression are twittered and frittered
into nothingness.

_The Rev. Dr. Opimian._ I quite agree with you. The other day a band
passed my gate playing 'The Campbells are coming'; but instead of the
fine old Scotch lilt, and the emphasis on 'Oho! oho!' what they actually
played was, 'The Ca-a-a-a-ampbells are co-o-o-o-ming, Oh-o-ho-o-o!
Oh-o-ho-o-o'; I thought to myself, There is the essence and quintessence
of modern music. I like the old organ-music such as it was, when there
were no keys but C and F, and every note responded to a syllable.
The effect of the prolonged and sustained sound must have been truly
magnificent:

'Where, through the long-drawn aisle and fretted vault,
The pealing anthem swelled the note of praise.'

Who cares to hear sacred music on a piano?

_Mr. Minim._ Yet I must say that there is a great charm in that
brilliancy of execution which is an exclusively modern and very modern
accomplishment

_Mr. Falconer._ To those who perceive it. All things are as they are
perceived. To me music has no charm without expression.

_Lord Curryfin._ (_who, having observed Mr. MacBorrowdale's
determination not to be drawn into an argument, amused himself with
asking his opinion on all subjects_). What is your opinion, Mr.
MacBorrowdale?

_Mr. MacBorrowdale._ I hold to the opinion I have already expressed,
that this is as good a glass of port as ever I tasted.

_Lord Curryfin._ I mean your opinion of modern music and musical
instruments.

_Mr. MacBorrowdale._ The organ is very good for psalms, which I never
sing, and the pianoforte for jigs, which I never dance. And if I
were not to hear either of them from January to December, I should not
complain of the privation.

_Lord Curryfin._ You are an utilitarian, Mr. MacBorrowdale. You are all
for utility--public utility--and you see none in music.

_Mr. MacBorrowdale._ Nay, not exactly so. If devotion is good, if
cheerfulness is good, and if music promotes each of them in proper time
and place, music is useful. If I am as devout without the organ, and as
cheerful without the piano, as I ever should be with them, that may
be the defect of my head or my ear. I am not for forcing my tastes or
no-tastes on other people. Let every man enjoy himself i