of the street was defined on the
retina of either eye, -- "I have learned two things by my
precious yesterday's expedition, that I didn't know before --
or that if I did, it was in a sort of latent, unrecognized
way; -- two pretty important things! -- That I wish I was a
Christian, -- yes, I do, -- and that there is a person in the
world who don't care a pin for me, whom I would lay down my
life for! -- How people would laugh at me if they knew it -- and
just because themselves they are not capable of it, and cannot
understand it. -- Why shouldn't I like what is worthy to be
liked? -- why shouldn't I _love_ it? It is to my honour that I
do! -- Because he don't like _me_, people would say; -- and why
should he like me? or what difference does it make? It is not
a fine face or a fair manner that has taken me -- if it were, I
should be only a fool like a great many others; -- it is those
things which will be as beautiful in heaven as they are here --
the beauty of goodness -- of truth -- and fine character. -- Why
should I not love it when I see it? I shall not see it often
in my life-time. And what has his liking of me to do with it?
How should he like me! The very reasons for which I look at
him would hinder his ever looking at me -- and ought. I am not
good, -- not good enough for him to look at me; there are good
things in me, but all run wild, or other things running wild
over them. I am not worthy to be spoken of in the day that his
name is mentioned. I wish I was good! -- I wish I was a
Christian! -- but I know one half of that wish is because he is
a Christian. --That's the sort of power that human beings have
over each other! The beauty of religion, in him, has drawn me
more, unspeakably, than all the sermons I ever heard in my
life. What a beautiful thing such a Christian is! -- what
living preaching! -- and without a word said. Without a word
said, -- it is in the eye, the brow, the lips, -- the very
carriage has the dignity of one who isn't a piece of this
world. Why aren't there more such! -- and this is the only one
that ever I knew! -- of all I have seen that called themselves
Christians. -- Would any possible combination ever make _me_ such
a person? -- Never! -- never. I shall be a rough piece of
Christianity if ever I am one at all. But I don't even know
what it is to be one. Oh, why couldn't he say three words more
yesterday! But he acted -- and looked -- as if I could do
without them. What did he mea