know that it is their nature to be cunning and
relentless: but to see men of intellect and education sly and snaky,
ferocious, yet servile to the utmost, makes one almost believe in total
depravity. The most of these men got what they deserved; namely, nothing:
the places were filled temporarily with others, and every thing went on
apparently as before. My position soon became very disagreeable. I had
received my instalment, not because I was wanted by the directors of the
hospital, but because they had been commanded by the government to accept
me in the hope of thus prolonging the life of Dr. Schmidt. Young and
inexperienced in petty intrigue, I had now to work without friendly
encouragement and appreciation, with no one about me in whom I had a
special interest; while every one was regretting that the instalment had
been given me before Dr. Schmidt's death, which might have happened just
as well from some other excitement, in an establishment where three
thousand people were constantly at war about each other's affairs. I
surveyed the whole arena, and saw very well, that, unless I practised
meanness and dishonesty as well as the rest, I could not remain there for
any length of time; for scores were ready to calumniate me whenever there
was the least thing to be gained by it.

I was about to commence a new period of life. I had a solid structure as
a foundation; but the superstructure had been built up in so short a time,
that a change of wind would suffice to cast it down. I resolved,
therefore, to tear it down myself, and to begin to build another upon the
carefully laid basis; and only waited for an opportunity to manifest my
intention. This opportunity soon presented itself. Sister Catherine, the
deaconess of whom I have spoken, who had been allowed to attend the School
of Midwives after my election, through the influence of her theological
friends upon Dr. Schmidt (the city magistrates having refused her because
I was already the third accepted pupil), had as yet no position: and these
friends now sought to make her the second _accoucheuse_; I having the
first position, with the additional title of Chief. This she would not
accept. She, the experienced deaconess, who had been a Florence
Nightingale in the typhus epidemic of Silesia, was unwilling to be under
the supervision of a woman who had nothing to show but a thorough
education, and who was, besides, eight years younger than herself. Her
refusal made my enem