my heart was too full to allow me to
remain in the house, and I walked, till I was wearied out, to purchase
rest--or rather forgetfulness.

Employment has beguiled this day, and to-morrow I set out for Moss, on my
way to Stromstad. At Gothenburg I shall embrace my Fannikin; probably
she will not know me again--and I shall be hurt if she do not. How
childish is this! still it is a natural feeling. I would not permit
myself to indulge the "thick coming fears" of fondness, whilst I was
detained by business. Yet I never saw a calf bounding in a meadow, that
did not remind me of my little frolicker. A calf, you say. Yes; but a
capital one I own.

I cannot write composedly--I am every instant sinking into reveries--my
heart flutters, I know not why. Fool! It is time thou wert at rest.

Friendship and domestic happiness are continually praised; yet how little
is there of either in the world, because it requires more cultivation of
mind to keep awake affection, even in our own hearts, than the common run
of people suppose. Besides, few like to be seen as they really are; and
a degree of simplicity, and of undisguised confidence, which, to
uninterested observers, would almost border on weakness, is the charm,
nay the essence of love or friendship, all the bewitching graces of
childhood again appearing. As objects merely to exercise my taste, I
therefore like to see people together who have an affection for each
other; every turn of their features touches me, and remains pictured on
my imagination in indelible characters. The zest of novelty is, however,
necessary to rouse the languid sympathies which have been hackneyed in
the world; as is the factitious behaviour, falsely termed good-breeding,
to amuse those, who, defective in taste, continually rely for pleasure on
their animal spirits, which not being maintained by the imagination, are
unavoidably sooner exhausted than the sentiments of the heart. Friendship
is in general sincere at the commencement, and lasts whilst there is
anything to support it; but as a mixture of novelty and vanity is the
usual prop, no wonder if it fall with the slender stay. The fop in the
play paid a greater compliment than he was aware of when he said to a
person, whom he meant to flatter, "I like you almost as well as a _new
acquaintance_." Why am I talking of friendship, after which I have had
such a wild-goose chase. I thought only of telling you that the crows,
as well as wild-