x! It's Fairfax! Fairfax, who--

PHOEBE Whom thou hast just shot through the head, and who
lies at the bottom of the river!

WILFRED A-- I-- I may have been mistaken. We are but fallible
mortals, the best of us. But I'll make sure-- I'll make
sure. [Going]

PHOEBE Stay-- one word. I think it cannot be Fairfax-- mind, I
say I think-- because thou hast just slain Fairfax. But
whether he be Fairfax or no Fairfax, he is to marry
Elsie-- and-- and-- as thou hast shot him through the
head, and he is dead, be content with that, and I will
be thy wife!

WILFRED Is that sure?

PHOEBE Aye, sure enough, for there's no help for it! Thou art
a very brute-- but even brutes must marry, I suppose.

WILFRED My beloved. [Embraces her]

PHOEBE [aside] Ugh!

[Enter LEONARD MERYLL, hastily

LEONARD Phoebe, rejoice, for I bring glad tidings. Colonel
Fairfax's reprieve was signed two days since, but it
was foully and maliciously kept back by Secretary
Poltwhistle, who designed that it should arrive after
the Colonel's death. It hath just come to hand, and it
is now in the Lieutenant's possession!

PHOEBE Then the Colonel is free? Oh, kiss me, kiss me, my
dear! Kiss me, again, and again!

WILFRED [dancing with fury] Ods bobs, death o' my life! Art
thou mad? Am I mad? Are we all mad?

PHOEBE Oh, my dear-- my dear, I'm well nigh crazed with joy!
[Kissing LEONARD]

WILFRED Come away from him, thou hussy-- thou jade-- thou
kissing, clinging cockatrice! And as for thee, sir,
devil take thee, I'll rip thee like a herring for
this! I'll skin thee for it! I'll cleave thee to the
chine! I'll-- oh! Phoebe! Phoebe! Who is this man?

PHOEBE Peace, fool. He is my brother!

WILFRED Another brother! Are there any more of them? Produce
them all at once, and let me know the worst!

PHOEBE This is the real Leonard, dolt; the other was but his
substitute. The real Leonard, I say-- my father's own
son.

WILFRED How do I know this? Has he "brother" writ large on his
brow? I mistrust thy brothers! Thou art but a false
jade!

[Exit LEONARD.

PHOEB