nearest opinion the Press gets to expressin' is
that of Mayors. 'Ave you never noticed, sir, that when the Press is 'ard
up for support of an opinion that the public don't 'old, they go to the
Mayors, and get 'em in two columns?"

"Mayors are most valuable public men," said Mr. Lavender.

"I've nothin' against 'em," replied Joe; "very average lot in their walk
of life; but they ain't the People."

Mr. Lavender sighed. "What, then, is the People, Joe?"

"I am," replied Joe; "I've got no opinions on anything except that I
want to live a quiet life--just enough beer and 'baccy, short hours, and
no worry."

"'If you compare that with the aspirations of Mayors you will see how
sordid such a standard is," said Mr. Lavender, gravely.

"Sordid it may be, sir," replied Joe; "but there's, a thing abaht it
you 'aven't noticed. I don't want to sacrifice nobody to satisfy my
aspirations. Why? Because I've got none. That's priceless. Take the
Press, take Parlyment, take Mayors--all mad on aspirations. Now it's
Free Trade, now it's Imperialism; now it's Liberty in Europe; now it's
Slavery in Ireland; now it's sacrifice of the last man an' the last
dollar. You never can tell what aspiration'll get 'em next. And the 'ole
point of an aspiration is the sacrifice of someone else. Don't you make
a mistake, sir. I defy you to make a public speech which 'asn't got that
at the bottom of it."

"We are wandering from the point, Joe," returned Mr. Lavender. "Who is
it that governs, the country?"

"A Unseen Power," replied Joe promptly.

"How?"

"Well, sir, we're a democratic country, ain't we? Parlyment's elected by
the People, and Gover'ment's elected by Parlyment. All right so far;
but what 'appens? Gover'ment says 'I'm going to do this.' So long as it
meets with the approval of the Unseen Power, well an' good. But what
if it don't? The U.P. gets busy; in an 'undred papers there begins to
appear what the U.P. calls Public Opinion, that's to say the opinion
of the people that agree with the U.P. There you 'ave it, sir, only
them--and it appears strong. Attacks on the Gover'ment policy, nasty
things said abaht members of it that's indiscreet enough to speak aht
what, they think--German fathers, and other secret vices; an' what's
more than all, not a peep at any opinion that supports the Gover'ment.
Well, that goes on day after day, playin' on the mind of Parlyment, if
they've got any, and gittin' on the Gover'ment's nerves, which they