us home with a skill equal to that
displayed by the blind fish of the Mammoth Cave. He beheld the
wonderfully constructed bunks which glowed specter-like in the
semi-darkness without evincing the least disappointment. Later when one
of these had been assigned as his sole property during the voyage he
accepted it and its diminutive proportions without a murmur and
philosophically concluded that the Government either thought he had
diminished in stature while on the islands or intended to reduce his
dimensions on the way home. Thus the Utah warrior was quartered. The
celerity with which he adapted himself to his environments clearly
exhibited his excellent training. He quickly disposed of the problem of
how to shorten his linear measurements to four feet eight inches by
placing himself diagonally across his bed. The posture thus assumed was
not unlike that of a "Skeleton in Armor." When his joints became cramped
he straightened himself out by throwing his soles against the head of
his neighbor, who instantly developed a remarkable vocabulary of
explosives anent Hades, Paradise, Satan, etc.

Mess time on the "Hancock" was not an occasion of the greatest felicity
to the returning volunteers. Their epicurean tastes could not totally
harmonize with bogus coffee and cows that had a flavor strangely akin to
that of horse flesh. When the bugle shrilly proclaimed the dinner hour
the men formed in a long serpentine line and displayed their skill in
keeping their equilibrium and at the same time holding their place in
the procession. The rattle of Government tinware, upon which the soldier
had inscribed many strange hieroglyphics descriptive of his adventures,
served as a musical entertainment in lieu of the melody furnished at all
other times by the combined efforts of the Utah and Nebraska bands. They
facetiously derided the commissary sergeant who had long since become
calloused to all sneering remarks made by the ordinary defender of the
flag; for in case of any exceedingly hostile demonstration he was armed
with a long cleaver and several carefully concealed bolos. They made
comments, too, not at all flattering to the bill of fare, about "gold
fish" and "slum-gullion" and ancient swine, but they "wasted their venom
on a file." The cooks, also, came in for a share of the complimentary
criticisms, for they were not blessed with a superabundance of skill in
the culinary art. Occasionally the voice of a volunteer was raised in
lou