n marching and countermarching over the
thirsty plains of the Carnatic, in medical charge of a native
regiment--salivating Sepoys and blowing out with blue pills the
officers--until the effects of a stiff jungle-fever, that nearly made me
proprietor of a landed property measuring six feet by two, sent me back to
England almost as poor as I had left it, and with an atrabilarious visage
which took a two-months' course of Cheltenham water to scour into anything
like a decent colour.

Withers' dinner was in the best taste: viands excellent--wine superb;
never did I sip racier Madeira, and the Champagne trickled down one's
throat with the same facility that man is inclined to sin.

The cloth drawn, we fell to discoursing about old times, things, persons,
and places. Jack then told me how from junior clerk he had risen to become
second partner in the firm to which he belonged; and I, in my turn,
enlightened his mind with respect to Asiatic Cholera, Runjeet Sing,
Ghuzni, tiger-shooting, and Shah Soojah.

In this manner the evening slid pleasantly on. An array of six bottles,
that before dinner had contained the juice of Oporto, stood empty on the
sideboard. Jack wanted to draw another cork, which, however, I positively
forbad, as I have through life made it a rule to avoid the slightest
approach towards excess in tippling; so, after a modest brace of glasses
of brandy-and-water, I shook hands with and left my friend about half-past
nine, for I am an old-fashioned fellow, and love early hours, my usual
time for turning in being ten.

When I got into the street an unaccustomed spirit of gaiety at once took
possession of me; my general feelings of benevolence and goodwill towards
all mankind appeared to have received a sudden and marvellous increase. I
seemed to tread on eider-down, and, cigar in mouth, strolled along
Fleet-street and the Strand, towards my domicile in Half-Moon
street--"nescio quid meditans nugarum"--sometimes humming the fag end of
an Irish melody; anon stopping to stare in a print-shop window; and then I
would trudge on, chewing the cud of sweet and bitter fancy as I conned
over the various ups and downs that had chequered my life since Jack
Withers and I were thoughtless lads together "a long time ago."

In this mood I found myself standing before the New Strand Theatre, my
attention having been arrested by the word PUNCH blazoned in large letters
on a play-bill.

"What can this mean?" quoth I to myself