y, may go to her relatives, and stay
until they're every one of them restored to health, if it takes
forty years. Mary may consider herself presented with sixty years'
vacation without pay; and for you, John, I have written this letter
of recommendation to the proprietors of a large undertaking
establishment in New York, who will, I trust, engage you as a chief
mourner, or perhaps hearse-driver, for the balance of your days. At
any rate, you, too, after January 1st, may consider yourself free to
go to any funeral or militia exercises, or anything else you may
choose to honor with your presence, at your own expense. You are
all given leave of absence without pay until further notice. I wish
you a merry Christmas. Good-morning."
There were no farewells in the house that day; and inasmuch as there
was no Christmas dinner either, Thaddeus and Bessie did not miss the
service of the waitress, who, when last seen, was walking airily off
towards the station, accompanied by the indignant John and a bundle-
laden cook. Next day their trunks went also.
"It was rather a hard thing to do on Christmas Day, Thaddeus," said
Bessie, a little later.
"Oh no," quibbled Thaddeus. "It was very easy under the
circumstances, and quite appropriate. This is the time of peace on
earth and good-will to men. The only way for us to have peace on
earth was to get rid of those two women; and as for John, he has my
good-will, now that he is no longer in my employ."
A STRANGE BANQUET
"Thaddeus," said Bessie to her husband as they sat at breakfast one
morning, shortly after the royal banquet over which "Grimmins" had
presided, "did you hear anything strange in the house last night?
Something like a footstep in the hall?"
"No," said Thaddeus. "I slept like a top last night. I didn't hear
anything. Did you?"
"I thought so," said Bessie. "About two o'clock I waked up with a
start, and while it may have been a sort of waking dream, I was
almost certain I heard a rustling sound out in the hall, and
immediately after a creaking on the stairs, as though there was
somebody there."
"Well, why on earth didn't you wake me, Bess?" returned Thaddeus.
"I could easily have decided the matter by getting up and
investigating."
"That was why I didn't wake you, Teddy. I'd a great deal rather
lose the silver or anything else in the house a burglar might want
than have you hit on the head with a sand-club," said Bessie. "You
men
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