e could
possibly have afforded it. Most satisfactory, I'm sure.

ERMYNTRUDE. May I regard myself as engaged then, Your Highness?

THE PRINCESS [alarmed]. Oh, I'm sure I don't know. If you like, of
course; but do you think I ought to?

ERMYNTRUDE. Naturally I think Your Highness ought to, most decidedly.

THE PRINCESS. Oh well, if you think that, I daresay you're quite right.
You'll excuse my mentioning it, I hope; but what wages--er--?

ERMYNTRUDE. The same as the maid who went to the ball. Your Highness
need not make any change.

THE PRINCESS. M'yes. Of course she began with less. But she had such a
number of relatives to keep! It was quite heartbreaking: I had to raise
her wages again and again.

ERMYNTRUDE. I shall be quite content with what she began on; and I have
no relatives dependent on me. And I am willing to wear my own dresses at
balls.

THE PRINCESS. I am sure nothing could be fairer than that. My uncle
can't object to that, can he?

ERMYNTRUDE. If he does, Your Highness, ask him to speak to me about
it. I shall regard it as part of my duties to speak to your uncle about
matters of business.

THE PRINCESS. Would you? You must be frightfully courageous.

ERMYNTRUDE. May I regard myself as engaged, Your Highness? I should like
to set about my duties immediately.

THE PRINCESS. Oh yes, I think so. Oh certainly. I--

A waiter comes in with the tea. He places the tray on the table.

THE PRINCESS. Oh, thank you.

ERMYNTRUDE [raising the cover from the tea cake and looking at it]. How
long has that been standing at the top of the stairs?

THE PRINCESS [terrified]. Oh please! It doesn't matter.

THE WAITER. It has not been waiting. Straight from the kitchen, madam,
believe me.

ERMYNTRUDE. Send the manager here.

THE WAITER. The manager! What do you want with the manager?

ERMYNTRUDE. He will tell you when I have done with him. How dare you
treat Her Highness in this disgraceful manner? What sort of pothouse is
this? Where did you learn to speak to persons of quality? Take away your
cold tea and cold cake instantly. Give them to the chambermaid you were
flirting with whilst Her Highness was waiting. Order some fresh tea
at once; and do not presume to bring it yourself: have it brought by a
civil waiter who is accustomed to wait on ladies, and not, like you, on
commercial travellers.

THE WAITER. Alas, madam, I am not accustomed to wait on anybody. Two
years ago I was an eminent medical man