is
hot, and beat your estates into hob-nails, mine host of the Bear being
strategus, and king piper lord orator. Well, my lords, it might have
been otherwise expressed, but this is well enough a-conscience. In your
way, the wit of man shall not prevent this or the like inconvenience;
but if this (for I have conferred with artists) be a mathematical
demonstration, I could kneel to you, that ere it be too late we might
return to some kind of sobriety. If we empty our purses with these
pomps, salaries, coaches, lackeys, and pages, what can the people say
less than that we have dressed a Senate and a prerogative for nothing
but to go to the park with the ladies?"

My Lord Archon, whose meekness resembled that of Moses, vouchsafed this
answer:

"My LORDS:

"For all this, I can see my Lord Epimonus every night in the park, and
with ladies; nor do I blame this in a young man, or the respect which is
and ought to be given to a sex that is one-half of the commonwealth of
mankind, and without which the other would be none: but our magistrates,
I doubt, may be somewhat of the oldest to perform this part with much
acceptation; and, as the Italian proverb says, 'Servire e non gradire
e cosa da far morire.' Wherefore we will lay no certain obligation upon
them in this point, but leave them, if it please you, to their own fate
or discretion. But this (for I know my Lord Epimonus loves me, though
I can never get his esteem) I will say, if he had a mistress should use
him so, he would find it a sad life; or I appeal to your lordships, how
I can resent it from such a friend, that he puts king piper's politics
in the balance with mine. King piper, I deny not, may teach his bears to
dance, but they have the worst ear of all creatures. Now how he
should make them keep time in fifty several tribes, and that two years
together, for else it will be to no purpose, may be a small matter with
my lord to promise; but it seems to me of impossible performance. First,
through the nature of the bean; and, secondly, through that of the
ballot; or how what he has hitherto thought so hard, is now come to be
easy; but he may think that for expedition they will eat up these balls
like apples.

"However, there is so much more in their way by the constitution of
this, than is to be found in that of any other commonwealth, that I am
reconciled, it now appearing plainly that the points of my lord's
arrows are directed at no other white than to show the ex