le decisively. "I should never be able to
feel as brave as wot you are when there's a raid on."
"'Oh ye of little faith!'" murmured Mr. Gupperduck mournfully.
"Think of Daniel in the lions' den," said Mrs. Bindle. "And Jonah in
the--er--interior of the whale," added Mr. Hearty with great delicacy.
"No," remarked Bindle, shaking his head with conviction, "I wasn't
made for lions, or whales. I suppose I'm a bit of a coward."
"I don't feel brave when there's a raid, Uncle Joe," said Millie
Hearty loyally. She had been a silent listener. "And mother isn't
either, are you, mums?" she turned to Mrs. Hearty.
"It's my breath," responded Mrs. Hearty, patting her ample bosom. "It
gets me here."
"That's because you don't go to chapel, Martha," said Bindle. "If you
was to turn up there three times on Sundays you'd be as brave as wot
Mr. Gupperduck is. Ain't that so?" he enquired, turning to Mr.
Gupperduck.
"You're always sneering at the chapel," broke in Mrs. Bindle, without
giving the lodger time to reply. "It doesn't do us any harm, whatever
you may think."
"That's jest where you're wrong, Mrs. B.," remarked Bindle, settling
himself down for a controversy. "I ain't got nothink to say against
the chapel, if they'd only let you set quiet; but it's such an up an'
down sort o' life. When you ain't kneelin' down a-askin' to be saved
from wot you know you deserves, or kept from doin' wot you're nuts on
doin', you're a-standin' up a-singin' 'ymns about all sorts of
uncomfortable things wot you says you 'opes to find in 'eaven."
"You have a jaundiced view of religion, Mr. Bindle," said Mr.
Gupperduck ponderously. "A jaundiced view," he repeated, pleased with
the phrase.
"'Ave I really?" enquired Bindle anxiously. "I 'ope it ain't catchin'.
No," he continued meditatively, "I wasn't meant for chapels. I seem to
be able to think best about 'eaven when I'm settin' smokin' after
supper, with Mrs. B. a-bangin' at the stove to remind me that I ain't
there yet."
"Wot does me," he continued, "is that I never yet see any of your
chapel coves 'appier for all your singin' an' prayin'. Why is it? Look
at you three now! If you was goin' to be plucked and trussed
to-morrow, you couldn't look more fidgety."
Instinctively each of the three looked at the other two. Mr.
Gupperduck shook his head hopelessly.
"You don't understand, Joseph," murmured Mr. Hearty with mournful
resignation.
"I can understand Ruddy Bill gettin' dr
|