ed I am very sorry,
Mr Hawthorne, sir"----

"Oh! never mind," said I; "you did right, no doubt. I can only say those
things are not mine, sir; they belong to a friend of mine."

"I don't ask who they belong to, sir," said the dean indignantly; "I
ask, sir, how came they in your rooms?"

"I believe, sir, my friend (he was in my rooms yesterday) left them
there. Some men wear stays, sir," continued I, boldly; "it's very much
the fashion, I'm told."

"Eh! hum!" said the dean, eyeing the brown jean doubtingly. "I have
heard of such things. Horrid puppies men are now. Never dreamt of such
things in my younger days; but then, sir, _we_ were not allowed to wear
white trousers, and waistcoats of I don't know what colours; we were
made to attend to the statutes, sir. '_Nigri aut suspici_,' sir, Ah!
times are changed--times are changed, indeed! And do you mean to say,
sir, you have a friend, a member of this university, who wears such
things as these?"

I might have got clear off, if it had not been for that rascal Simmons.
I saw him give the dean a look, and an almost imperceptible shake of the
head.

"But I don't think, sir," resumed he, "these can be a man's stays--eh,
Simmons?" Simmons looked diligently at his toes. "No," said the dean,
investigating the unhappy garment more closely--"no, I fear, Simmons,
these are female stays!"

The conscientious Simmons made no sign.

"I don't know, sir," said I, as he looked from Simmons to me. "I don't
wear stays, and I know nothing about them. If Simmons were to fetch a
pair of Mrs Simmons's, sir," resumed I, "you could compare them."

Mrs Simmons's figure resembled a sack of flour, with a string round it;
and, if she did wear the articles in question, they must have been of a
pattern almost unique--made to order.

"Sir," said the dean, "your flippancy is unbecoming. I shall not pursue
this investigation any further; but I am bound to tell you, sir, this
circumstance is suspicious--very suspicious." I could not resist a smile
for the life of me. "And doubly suspicious, sir, in your case. The eyes
of the college are upon you, sir." He was evidently losing his temper,
so I bowed profoundly, and he grew more irate. "Ever since, sir, that
atrocious business of the frogs, though the college authorities failed
in discovering the guilty parties, there are some individuals, sir,
whose conduct is watched attentively. Good-morning, sir."

The "business of the frogs," to which the de