less and
shaky in the mornings. Then I began to have periodical fits of
drunkenness; then I became quite untrustworthy, and last of all I robbed
my father during a bad fit, and we parted."

"And then?"

"I picked up odd jobs for newspapers, or sponged on my brother. At last
I was sent to the House as reporter, and did very well until one night
when Palmerston was expected to make an important speech. My turn came,
and I was blind and helpless. Since then I have been in place after
place, but the end was always the same, and I have learned that I am a
hopeless, worthless wretch."

"But couldn't your brother, for his own credit's sake, keep you in his
house and put you under treatment?"

"My good friend, I should die under it. I revel in degradation. I
luxuriate in self-contempt. My time is short, and I want to pass it away
speedily. This life suits me, for I seldom have my senses, and there is
only the early morning to dread. I think then--think, think, think.
Until I can scrape together my first liquor I see ugly things. I should
be in my own town with my grandchildren round me. I might have been on
the Bench, like my brother, and all men would have respected me as they
do him. Sons and daughters would have gathered round me when I came to
my last hour. I gave it all up in order to sluice my throat with brandy
and gin. That is the way I think in the morning. Then I take a glass, or
beg one, as I shall from you presently, and then I forget. Once I went
out to commit suicide, and took three whiskies to string my nerve up. In
two minutes I was laughing at a Punch and Judy show. If you'll kindly
order a quartern of gin in a pint glass for me, I'll fill it up and be
quite content all the evening. No one ill-uses me. I'm a soft, harmless,
disreputable old ne'er-do-well. That is all."

We drank, and then the Gentleman said, "You come here a good deal too
much. Your hand was not quite right yesterday morning. Usually you keep
right, and I really don't know how far you are touched. If I had your
youth and your appearance, I think I should save myself in time by a
bold step. Join the temperance people and work publicly; then you are
committed, and you can't step back."

"But you don't think that I am likely to go to the dogs? I loaf around
here because I have no ambition, and my life was settled for me; but I
have command over myself."

"You _had_ command over yourself, you mean. I think you are in great
danger--very gre