n
without friends.

Next morning James wandered in the Park, fresh and delightful with the
rhododendrons; but the people he saw hurt him by their almost aggressive
happiness--vivacious, cheerful, and careless, they were all evidently of
opinion that no reasonable creature could complain with the best of all
possible worlds. The girls that hurried past on ponies, or on bicycles
up and down the well-kept road, gave him an impression of
light-heartedness which was fascinating, yet made his own solitude more
intolerable. Their cheeks glowed with healthiness in the summer air, and
their gestures, their laughter, were charmingly animated. He noticed the
smile which a slender Amazon gave to a man who raised his hat, and read
suddenly in their eyes a happy, successful tenderness. Once, galloping
towards him, he saw a woman who resembled Mrs. Wallace, and his heart
stood still. He had an intense longing to behold her just once more,
unseen of her; but he was mistaken. The rider approached and passed, and
it was no one he knew.

Then, tired and sore at heart, James went back to his club. The day
passed monotonously, and the day after he was seized by the peculiar
discomfort of the lonely sojourner in great cities. The thronging, busy
crowd added to his solitariness. When he saw acquaintances address one
another in the club, or walk along the streets in conversation, he could
hardly bear his own friendlessness; the interests of all these people
seemed so fixed and circumscribed, their lives were already so full,
that they could only look upon a new-comer with hostility. He would have
felt less lonely on a desert island than in the multitudinous city,
surrounded by hurrying strangers. He scarcely knew how he managed to
drag through the day, tired of the eternal smoking-room, tired of
wandering about. The lodgings which Major Forsyth had recommended were
like barracks; a tall, narrow house, in which James had a room at the
top, looking on to a blank wall. They were dreadfully cheerless. And as
James climbed the endless stairs he felt an irritation at the joyous
laughter that came from other rooms. Behind those closed, forbidding
doors people were happy and light of heart; only he was alone, and must
remain perpetually imprisoned within himself. He went to the theatre,
but here again, half insanely, he felt a barrier between himself and the
rest of the audience. For him the piece offered no illusions; he could
only see painted acto