s involved quite a lot of expense,
And the armies that stand
When there's peace in the land
Are the most unproductive of toys,--"
Said Governor Tom to the boys.

Said Governor Tom to the law-making boys:
"It is well to remember the wills
Of the people who settle the bills,
And the anger that lurks
In the hosts at the works
Is a matter that greatly annoys,--"
Said Governor Tom to the boys!

The boys heard the message, each sentiment seized,
And then went ahead and did just as they pleased;
And no one would know
From the way that they go,
From the money they spend and the peace they destroy,
What the Governor said to each law-making boy!

Caught on the Fly.

If some people couldn't worry, or make others worry, they'd never have a
moment of happiness.

Don't go gunning for happiness. When you are least expecting it she
squats at your feet and hops out to meet you.

Little Sermons.

If there wasn't a Devil, some people would have nobody but themselves to
blame their sins on.

When we link hands with pleasure for a few minutes, we forget all the
wisdom Trouble has taught us through the years.

Some people like to move about so much, that if they bought a ticket for
heaven they'd insist on getting a round-trip in order to be on the safe
side.

If the golden streets could be dug up and carried off to the smelter,
there'd be whole battalions of people lined up before daylight with
grubbing-hoes on their shoulders waiting to stake off claims.

Mister Ground Hog.

Ole Mistah Groun'-hog rouse hisse'f
Fum dat long nap he take;
He say: "Ah 'spec' Ah'd bettah move,--
It's gittin' late, my sake!"

So he jes' rub his ole eyes wide,
En dress up foh a stroll;
He wax his whiskehs up, en den
He crawl out ob his hole!

Up yondah shine de big red sun,
Eh-blazin' in the sky,
En at his side his shaddeh walk,--
So Mistah Groun'-hog fly!

He skeehed so bad he tuhn him 'roun'
En say, "Ah wake too soon;
Ah'll jes' go home en take a nap
'Twel Sunday aftehnoon!"

So Mistah Groun'-hog run en run
En crawl his deep hole in,
Toh snooze ehway foh six moah weeks
'Foh he wakes up ehgin!

When Trouble Came.

Ole Trouble come toh ouah house
One stohmy day en say,
"De road am hahd toh trabble,--
Ah hope you'll lemme stay