before, and treated me as if I had been a cousin, and has no
doubt laughed many a time at the thought of that morning in the garden
at Newquay, and indeed thought so little of it that he did not mind my
seeing all those sketches of that woman in his note-books.

"There were three or four of them, too, stuck up on the walls of his
room. Of course she goes there. He said she was a model. Of course he is
fond of her. I should not have thought it of him, but men are wicked and
women are fools," she added, after a pause, "and I do think that I am
one of the most foolish of them. I am like a child who throws away a toy
one minute and cries for it the next. It is horrid, and I am ashamed of
myself, downright ashamed. I hate myself to think that just because a
man is nice to me, and leaves me two pictures if he is killed, that I am
to make myself miserable about him, and to feel that I could give up all
my plans in life for his sake. I understand now how it is that women are
content to remain what they are. It is because nature made them so. We
are like weathercocks, and have no fixed point, but can be turned by a
passing breath.

"We have no rights because we are content to remain slaves. Here is my
life spoilt. A week ago I was my own mistress and felt as free and
independent as any man; now a thrill runs through me at ever
cannon-shot. The things that had seemed so important to me then do not
occupy a thought now. However, I hope I am not quite a fool. I shall
shake it off in time perhaps," and she smiled pitifully, "it will even
do me good. I shall understand things better. Anna used to tell me I was
intolerant and made no allowance for human nature. I laughed then, but
she was right. When this is all over I shall go away. I don't suppose I
shall ever see him again, and I will make up my mind not to think of him
any more. I wonder what he is doing now, whether his corps went out last
night or will go to-day. I hope they won't be in front. They have no
right to put volunteers in front when they have got regular soldiers. It
is downright wicked that he should have enlisted when it was no business
of his. I wonder she let him do it."

Then she broke off, rose to her feet suddenly, and with an angry
exclamation, "Mary Brander, you are a weak fool," she started back at a
quick pace and with head erect. Again she walked round the Boulevards,
and having thoroughly tired herself, made her way home, drank a cup of
bouillon made fr