or
Cocky. Benjamin dozed with dignity. He knew Cocky wasn't watching for
his yellow eyes.

I don't think Lettice meant mischief when she summoned the spectators,
for time was up. But her warning the curtain to rise when it did was
simple malice and revenge.

I never can forget the catastrophe, but I do not clearly remember how
Tom Smith and I _began_ to quarrel. He was excessively impudent, and
seemed to think we couldn't have had a Happy Family without him and
his chattering senseless magpie.

When I told him to remember he was speaking to a gentleman, he grinned
at me.

"A gentleman? Nay, my sakes! Ye're not civil enough by half. More like
a new policeman, if ye weren't such a Guy Fawkes in that finery."

"Be off," said I, "and take your bird with you."

"What if I won't go?"

"I'll make you!"

"Ye darsen't touch me."

"Daren't I?"

"Ye darsen't."

"I dare."

"Try."

"_Are_ you going?"

"Noa."

I only pushed him. He struck first. He's bigger than me, but he's a
bigger coward, and I'd got him down in the middle of the stage, and
had given him something to bawl about, before I became conscious that
the curtain was up. I only realised it then, because civil, stupid
Fred, arrived at the left wing, panting and gasping--

"Measter Bayard! Here's a young wood-owl for ye."

As he spoke, it escaped him, fluff and feathers flying in the effort,
and squawking, plunging, and fluttering, made wildly for the darkest
corner of the stage, just as Lettice ran on the mechanical mouse in
front.

Bernard rose, and shook off everything, and Cocky went into screaming
hysterics; above which I now heard the thud of Uncle Patrick's crutch,
and the peals upon peals of laughter with which our audience greeted
my long-planned spectacle of a Happy Family!

* * * * *

Our Irish uncle is not always nice. He teases and mocks, and has an
uncertain temper. But one goes to him in trouble. I went next morning
to pour out my woes, and defend myself, and complain of the others.

I spoke seriously about Lettice. It is not pleasant for a fellow to
have a sister who grows up peculiar, as I believe Lettice will. Only
the Sunday before, I told her she would be just the sort of woman men
hate, and she said she didn't care; and I said she ought to, for women
were made for men, and the Bible says so; and she said grandmamma said
that every soul was made for GOD and its own final good. She
was in a hig