ide the head of the
bed and sat on it--for this was to be an easy death. I then bore just
enough weight on the improvised noose to give all a plausible look. And
a last lifelike (or rather deathlike) touch I added by gurgling as in
infancy's happy days.

No schoolboy ever enjoyed a prank more than I enjoyed this one. Soon I
heard the step of the attendant, bringing my supper. When he opened the
door, he had no idea that anything unusual was happening within. Coming
as he did from a well-lighted room into one that was dark, it took him
several seconds to grasp the situation--and then he failed really to
take it in, for he at once supposed me to be in a semi-unconscious
condition from strangulation. In a state of great excitement this brute
of the morning called to his brute partner and I was soon released from
what was nothing more than an amusing position, though they believed it
one of torture or death. The vile curses with which they had addressed
me in the morning were now silenced. They spoke kindly and expressed
regret that I should have seen fit to resort to such an act. Their
sympathy was as genuine as such men can feel, but a poor kind at best,
for it was undoubtedly excited by the thought of what might be the
consequences to them of their own neglect. While this unwonted stress
of emotion threatened their peace of mind, I continued to play my part,
pretending to be all but unconscious.

Shortly after my rescue from a very living death, the attendants picked
me up and carried my limp body and laughing soul to an adjoining room,
where I was tenderly placed upon a bed. I seemed gradually to revive.

"What did you do it for?" asked one.

"What's the use of living in a place like this, to be abused as I've
been to-day?" I asked. "You and the doctor ignore me and all my
requests. Even a cup of water between meals is denied me, and other
requests which you have no right to refuse. Had I killed myself, both
of you would have been discharged. And if my relatives and friends had
ever found out how you had abused and neglected me, it is likely you
would have been arrested and prosecuted."

Word had already been sent to the physician. He hurried to the ward,
his almost breathless condition showing how my farce had been mistaken
for a real tragedy. The moment he entered I abandoned the part I had
been playing.

"Now that I have you three brutes where I want you, I'll tell you a few
things you don't know," I said. "Yo