FREE BOOKS

Author's List




PREV.   NEXT  
|<   321   322   323   324   325   326   327   328   329   330   331   332   333   334   335   336   337   338   339   340   341   342   343   344   345  
346   347   348   349   350   351   352   353   354   355   356   357   358   359   360   361   362   363   364   365   366   367   368   369   370   >>   >|  
were not usual, and therefore she was careful to avoid being seen as she went; but had she been interrogated she would have persevered. Who had a right to stop her? But where should she go? The reader may perhaps remember that once when Mr. Fenwick first found this poor girl, after her flight from home and her great disgrace, she had expressed a desire to go to the mill and just look at it,--even if she might do no more than that. The same idea was now in her mind, but as she left the city she had no concerted plan. There were two things between which she must choose at once,--either to go to London, or not to go to London. She had money enough for her fare, and perhaps a few shillings over. In a dim way she did understand that the choice was between going to the devil at once,--and not going quite at once; and then, weakly, wistfully, with uncertain step, almost without an operation of her mind, she did not take the turn which, from the end of Trotter's Buildings, would have brought her to the Railway Station, but did take that which led her by the Three Honest Men out on to the Devizes road,--the road which passes across Salisbury Plain, and leads from the city to many Wiltshire villages,--of which Bullhampton is one. She walked slowly, but she walked nearly the whole day. Nothing could be more truly tragical than the utterly purposeless tenour of her day,--and of her whole life. She had no plan,--nothing before her; no object even for the evening and night of that very day in which she was wasting her strength on the Devizes road. It is the lack of object, of all aim, in the lives of the houseless wanderers that gives to them the most terrible element of their misery. Think of it! To walk forth with, say, ten shillings in your pocket,--so that there need be no instant suffering from want of bread or shelter,--and have no work to do, no friend to see, no place to expect you, no duty to accomplish, no hope to follow, no bourn to which you can draw nigher,--except that bourn which, in such circumstances, the traveller must surely regard as simply the end of his weariness! But there is nothing to which humanity cannot attune itself. Men can live upon poison, can learn to endure absolute solitude, can bear contumely, scorn, and shame, and never show it. Carry Brattle had already become accustomed to misery, and as she walked she thought more of the wretchedness of the present hour, of her weary feet, of her hunger,
PREV.   NEXT  
|<   321   322   323   324   325   326   327   328   329   330   331   332   333   334   335   336   337   338   339   340   341   342   343   344   345  
346   347   348   349   350   351   352   353   354   355   356   357   358   359   360   361   362   363   364   365   366   367   368   369   370   >>   >|  



Top keywords:
walked
 

object

 

misery

 

shillings

 

Devizes

 

London

 

pocket

 

instant

 
houseless
 

evening


wasting

 

strength

 

tragical

 

utterly

 
purposeless
 

tenour

 

terrible

 

element

 

wanderers

 

follow


contumely

 

solitude

 
absolute
 

poison

 

endure

 
present
 

hunger

 

wretchedness

 

thought

 
Brattle

accustomed

 
attune
 
expect
 

accomplish

 
shelter
 

friend

 

nigher

 
simply
 

weariness

 

humanity


regard

 
surely
 

circumstances

 

traveller

 

suffering

 

Station

 
disgrace
 
expressed
 
desire
 

flight