d down below the line of fire. He said the mule had been
trained to that, and I would find him a great comfort in time of trial,
and a sympathizing companion always, one that I would become attached
to. I told him there was one thing I wanted to know, and that was if the
mule would kick. I had always been prejudiced against mules because
they kicked. He said he knew mules had been traduced, and that their
reputations were not good, but he believed this mule was as free from
the habit of kicking as any mule he had ever met. He said he would not
deny that this mule could kick, and in fact he had kicked a little, but
he would warrant the mule not to kick unless something unusual happened.
He said I wouldn't want a mule that had no individuality at all, one
that hadn't sand enough to protect itself. What I wanted, the chaplain
said, was a mule that would treat everybody right, but that would, if
imposed upon, stand up for its rights and kick. I told the chaplain that
was about the kind of mule I wanted, if I had any mule at all, and we
traded. The chaplain rode off to town on my horse, on a canter, as proud
as a peacock, while I climbed on to the solemn, lop-eared mule and went
out to drill with my company. I do not know what it was that went wrong
with the mule while we were drilling, but as we were wheeling in company
front, the mule began to "assert his individuality," as the chaplain
said he probably would, and he whirled around sideways and kicked three
soldiers off their horses; then he backed up the other way and broke
up the second platoon, kicked four horses in the ribs, stampeded the
company, and stood there alone kicking at the air. The major rode down
to where I was and began to swear at me, but I told him I couldn't
help it. He told me to dismount and lead the mule away, but I couldn't
dismount until the mule stopped kicking, and he seemed to be wound up
for all day. The major got too near and the mule kicked him on the
shin, and then started for the company again, which had got into ranks,
kicking all the way, and the company broke ranks and started for camp,
the mule following, kicking and braying all the way. I never was so
helpless in all my life. The more I spurred the mule, the more it
kicked, and if I stopped spurring it, it kicked worse. When we got to
camp, I fell off some way, and rushed into the chaplain's tent, and the
mule kicked the tent down, and some boys drove the mule away, and while
I was fixin