me an estate; take them all, if
need be, so I be not brought to bed; for I know not how I should do,
seeing I hear women make such a terrible outcry, whereas they are
about to bear child, for all they have ample commodity therefor, that
methinketh, if I had that pain to suffer, I should die ere I came to
the bringing forth.' Quoth the doctor, 'Have no fear of that; I will
let make thee a certain ptisan of distilled waters, very good and
pleasant to drink, which will in three mornings' time carry off
everything and leave thee sounder than a fish; but look thou be more
discreet for the future and suffer not thyself fall again into these
follies. Now for this water it behoveth us have three pairs of fine
fat capons, and for other things that are required thereanent, do thou
give one of these (thy comrades) five silver crowns, so he may buy
them, and let carry everything to my shop; and to-morrow, in God's
name, I will send thee the distilled water aforesaid, whereof thou
shalt proceed to drink a good beakerful at a time.' 'Doctor mine,'
replied Calandrino, 'I put myself in your hands'; and giving Bruno
five crowns and money for three pairs of capons, he besought him to
oblige him by taking the pains to buy these things.

[Footnote 427: _Scimmione_ (lit. ape), a contemptuous distortion of
_Simone_.]

The physician then took his leave and letting make a little
clary,[428] despatched it to Calandrino, whilst Bruno, buying the
capons and other things necessary for making good cheer, ate them in
company with his comrades and Master Simone. Calandrino drank of his
clary three mornings, after which the doctor came to him, together
with his comrades, and feeling his pulse, said to him, 'Calandrino,
thou art certainly cured; wherefore henceforth thou mayst safely go
about thine every business nor abide longer at home for this.'
Accordingly, Calandrino arose, overjoyed, and went about his
occasions, mightily extolling, as often as he happened to speak with
any one, the fine cure that Master Simone had wrought of him, in that
he had unbegotten him with child in three days' time, without any
pain; whilst Bruno and Buffalmacco and Nello abode well pleased at
having contrived with this device to overreach his niggardliness,
albeit Dame Tessa, smoking the cheat, rated her husband amain
thereanent."

[Footnote 428: _Chiarea._ According to the commentators, the
composition of this drink is unknown, but that of clary, a sort of
hippoc