r over, of good
stamina, with plenty of scent, intelligent and preferably unmarried.
The League Secretary was ---- (here followed the name, earth and
covert of a well-known veteran).

There was other matter, of course. A "Grand Prize Competition--A
Turkey a Week for Life!" was announced. A humorous article on
Earth-Stoppers and, on the "Vixens' Page," a discussion as to the
edibility of Pekinese.

Absent-mindedly I crumpled up the astounding rag and thrust it down
the hole.

* * * * *

I arose stiff, bemused. The hot March sunshine and the song of
birds had left me drowsy. A glance at my watch showed me, to my
astonishment, that was tea-time. So I made my way home.

The reception of my story was as cold as the tea. They weren't such
fools, they said, as to believe it. So, knowing your larger charity,
dear Mr. Punch, I send it to you.

And I shall await that retrospective article in some Maytime _Field_,
entitled "A Season of Disasters."

* * * * *

A CRITICAL PROBLEM.

"_The Admirable Crichton_ is still one of the most captivating
of modern plays, rich in humour, scenically 'telling' and
close-packed with Barrieisms."--_Times_.

"'Crichton' is one of the most agreeable Barrie plays, because
it is so free from Barrieisms."--_Manchester Guardian_.

* * * * *

SURMISES AND SURPRISES.

The appearance of the Dean of ST. PAUL'S at a recent social gathering
not in the character of a wet blanket, but as a teller of jocund tales
and a retailer of humorous anecdotes, must not be taken as an
isolated and transient transformation, but as foreshadowing a
general conversion of writers and publicists hitherto associated with
utterances of a mordant, bitter, sardonic and pessimistic tone.

It is rumoured at Cambridge that Mr. MAYNARD KEYNES, mollified by the
reception of his momentous work, has plunged into an orgy of optimism,
the first-fruits of which will be a treatise on _The Gastronomic
Consequences of the Peace_. Those who have been fortunate enough to
see the MS. declare that the personal sketches of Mr. CLYNES, Mr. G.H.
ROBERTS, Mr. HOOVER and M. ESCOFFIER are marked by a coruscating wit
unparalleled in the annals of Dietetics. The account of a dinner
at the "White Horse" is perhaps the _clou_ of an exceptionally
exhilarating entertainment.

This agreeable swing of the pendulum is further illustr