that one old gentleman, misled by the chef's quite innocent
use of adjectives, protested to a waitress that the day was really
very warm; also that a youthful wag obliterated the initial C from his
menu with a pen-knife and then inquired which was the better vintage,
'06 or '09.

* * * * *

But to contend that there is no difference between a good yellow
man and a good white man is like saying that a vegetarian chop of
minced peas is like a chop of the chump variety.--_New Witness_.

Chop-chop--as the good yellow man might be tempted to say if he came
upon this specimen of white wisdom.

* * * * *

Canvassers can make a very good profit by selling a patent
ladies' folding handbag, also wristlet watches.--Advt. in _Daily
Mail_.

Nevertheless, the only place for a patent lady is a registry
office.

* * * * *

CAKEOMA PUDDING? You cannot know how delicious they are until you
have tasted them.--Advt. in _Lady's Companion_.

One of the things that would never have occurred to you if you hadn't
seen it expressed so clearly.

* * * * *

SAXON.--How cruel of you. Although I have not the honour of cap
and gown, I do possess a Classical Dictionary. If I can help
further, write again. Regarding the recipe, it depends upon its
nature. Perhaps VERA is the lady to whom you should address your
question--_Lady's Companion_.

My colleague, Mr Edgar J. Saxon, denies all knowledge of this affair.
But I do wish he would be a little more careful in future.

PETER PIPER.

HEALTH QUERIES.

_Under this heading Dr Knaggs deals briefly month by month, and
according as space permits, with questions of general interest._

_Correspondents are earnestly requested to write on one side only of
the paper, giving full name and address, not for publication, but as a
guarantee of good faith. When an answer is required by post a stamped
addressed envelope must be enclosed._--[EDS.]

CAN MALARIA BE PREVENTED?

A. de L. (Lisbon) writes:--For five months I have been a strict
"fruitarian," and as I am obliged now to go to Mozambique
(Portuguese East Africa) to remain there five rears, I should be
much obliged to you if you kindly let me know what I must do to
prevent the African fever and biliousness which seem to afflict
all Euro