they are privates. Let
them upstairs. They went (for first and last time) on tiptoe.

July 18.--Saw Q.M.S. Beddem in the town. Took shelter in the King's
Arms.

Jug. 3.--Went to Cornwall.

Aug. 31.--Returned. Billets received me very hospitably.

Sept. 4.--Private Budd, electrical engineer, dissatisfied with
appearance of bell-push in dining-room, altered it.

Sept. 5.--Bells out of order.

Sept. 6.--Private Merited, also an electrical engineer, helped Private
Budd to repair bells.

Sept. 7.--Private Budd helped Private Merited to repair bells.

Sept. 8.--Privates Budd and Merited helped each other to repair bells.

Sept. 9.--Sent to local tradesman to put my bells in order.

Sept. 15.--Told that Q.M.S. Beddem wished to see me. Saw C.O. first.
She thought he had possibly come to take some of the billets away.
Q.M.S. met my approach with a smile that re-minded me vaguely of picture-
postcards I had seen. Awfully sorry to trouble me, but Private Montease,
just back from three weeks' holiday with bronchitis, was sleeping in the
wood-shed on three planks and a tin-tack. Beamed at me and waited. Went
and bought another bed-stead.

Sept. 16.--Private Montease and a cough entered into residence.

Sept. 17, 11.45 p.m.--Maid came to bedroom-door with some cough lozenges
which she asked me to take to the new billet. Took them. Private
Montease thanked me, but said he didn't mind coughing. Said it was an
heirloom; Montease cough, known in highest circles all over Scotland
since time of Young Pretender.

Sept. 20.--Private Montease installed in easy-chair in dining-room with
touch of bronchitis, looking up trains to Bournemouth.

Sept. 21.--Private Montease in bed all day. Cook anxious "to do her
bit" rubbed his chest with home-made embrocation. Believe it is same
stuff she rubs chests in hall with. Smells the same anyway.

Sept. 24.--Private Montease, complaining of slight rawness of chest, but
otherwise well, returned to duty.

Oct. 5.--Cough worse again. Private Montease thinks that with care it
may turn to bronchitis. Borrowed an A.B.C.

Oct. 6.--Private Montease relates uncanny experience. Woke up with
feeling of suffocation to find an enormous black-currant and glycerine
jujube wedged in his gullet. Never owned such a thing in his life.
Seems to be unaware that he always sleeps with his mouth open.

Nov. 14.--Private Bowser, youngest and tallest of my billets, gazetted.