rence to
the signification: others do it from "that fastidiousness," as one says,
"which makes some men walk on the highroad as if the whole business of
their life was to keep their boots clean."

Mr. Hill was a man very much accustomed to talk in this way. He had read
little, but had studied the dictionary with considerable diligence. His
ideas were few and far between, but his words were many and diversified,
long and hard, sometimes connected in the most absurd and ludicrous
manner. Most of the illiterate who heard him thought he was highly
educated and intelligent, while men of taste and judgment considered him
greatly deficient in the first rudiments of correct speaking.

Mr. Hill and his friend Mr. Pope made a call one day last spring upon
Squire Foster. As they came to the front door of his house Mr. Hill said
to Mr. Pope,--

"Will you do me the exuberant honour of agitating the communicator of
the ingress door, that the maid may receive the information that some
attendant individuals are leisurely waiting at the exterior of the
mansion to propose their interrogatories after the resident proprietor."

"Did you want me to pull the door bell for you?" asked Mr. Pope.

"If you have that extremely obliging state of mind, which will permit
you to do that deed of exceeding condescension, I shall experience the
deepest emotionals of unprecedented gratitude," replied Mr. Hill.

"Why didn't you say, If you please? and have done with it," replied Mr.
Pope, in a manner which indicated impatience at his gibberish.

The servant appeared and opened the door.

"Will you have the propitiousness, the kindness to stay and communicate
unto me whether Squire Foster is in his residence?" said Mr. Hill.

The girl looked vacant, not knowing what to make of his question.

"What does the gentleman mean?" asked the servant of Mr. Pope.

"He wants to know if Squire Foster is at home."

"Yes, sir, he is. Will you walk in?"

Mr. Hill and his friend were showed into the parlour, where they waited
the coming of the Squire. After a brief interval "the resident
proprietor" made his appearance.

"Ah, ah! how do you do, Mr. Hill? I am very glad to see you," said the
Squire, at the same time shaking him by the hand.

"I am in the highest state of excellent health, extremely obliged,
Squire. I am sanguine to hope, sir, that you live in the felicity of
enjoying, and possessing, and feeling an undistracted state of the
physical consti