ming her dyspeptic atrocities. Muffins therefore being laid at one
angle of the table and pistols at the other, with rigid equity the
Colonel awaited the result. This was naturally pretty much as usual; and
then the poor man, incapable of retreating from his word of honour,
committed suicide, having left a line for posterity to the effect, "that
a muffinless world was no world for him."

It will be recollected that, during the Christmas festivities at Manor
Farm, after a certain amount of kissing had taken place under the
mistletoe, Mr. Pickwick was "standing under the mistletoe, looking with a
very pleased countenance on all that was passing round him, when the
young lady with the black eyes, after a little whispering with the other
young ladies, made a sudden dart forward, and putting her arm round Mr.
Pickwick's neck, saluted him affectionately on the left cheek, and before
he distinctly knew what was the matter he was surrounded by the whole
bevy, and kissed by every one of them." Compare with this what happened
to Dr. Johnson in the Hebrides:

"This evening one of our married ladies, a lively, pretty little
woman, good-humouredly sat down upon Dr. Johnson's knee, and being
encouraged by some of the company, put her hands round his neck and
kissed him. "Do it again," said he, "and let us see who will tire
first." He kept her on his knee some time while he and she drank tea.
He was now like a _buck_ indeed. All the company were much
entertained to find him so easy and pleasant. To me it was highly
comic to see the grave philosopher--the Rambler--toying with a
Highland beauty! But what could he do? He must have been surly, and
weak too, had he not behaved as he did. He would have been laughed
at, and not more respected, though less loved."

Was not this Mr. Pickwick exactly?

Or, we might fancy this little scene taking place at Dunvegan Castle, on
the night of the dance, when Johnson was in such high good-humour. His
faithful henchman might have come up to him and have said jocosely,
"_You_, sir, in silk stockings?"

"And why not, sir--why not?" said the Doctor warmly. "Oh, of course,"
I answered, "there is no reason why you should not wear them." "I
imagine not, sir--I imagine not," said the Doctor in a very peremptory
tone. I had contemplated a laugh, but found it was a serious matter.
I looked grave, and said they were a pretty pattern. "I hope they