The Project Gutenberg EBook of Cobb's Anatomy, by Irvin S. Cobb

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Title: Cobb's Anatomy

Author: Irvin S. Cobb

Posting Date: August 15, 2008 [EBook #1222]
Release Date: February, 1998

Language: English

Character set encoding: ASCII

*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK COBB'S ANATOMY ***

Produced by Kirk Pearson

COBB'S ANATOMY

By Irvin S. Cobb

To G. H. L.

Who stood godfather to these contents

Preface

This Space To-Let to Any Reputable Party Desiring a Good Preface

Contents

I. Tummies
II. Teeth
III. Hair
IV. Hands and feet

TUMMIES

Dr. Woods Hutchinson says that fat people are happier than other people.
How does Dr. Woods Hutchinson know? Did he ever have to leave the two
top buttons of his vest unfastened on account of his extra chins? Has
the pressure from within against the waistband where the watchfob is
located ever been so great in his case that he had partially to undress
himself to find out what time it was? Does he have to take the tailor's
word for it that his trousers need pressing?

He does not. And that sort of a remark is only what might be
expected from any person upward of seven feet tall and weighing about
ninety-eight pounds with his heavy underwear on. I shall freely take Dr.
Woods Hutchinson's statements on the joys and ills of the thin. But when
he undertakes to tell me that fat people are happier than thin
people, it is only hearsay evidence with him and decline to accept his
statements unchallenged. He is going outside of his class. He is, as you
might say, no more than an innocent bystander. Whereas I am a qualified
authority.

I will admit that at one stage of my life, I regarded fleshiness as a
desirable asset. The incident came about in this way. There was a circus
showing in our town and a number of us proposed to attend it. It was
one of those one-ring, ten-cent circuses that used to go about over the
country, and it is my present recollection that all of us had funds laid
by sufficient to buy tickets; but if we could procure admission in the
regular way we felt it would be a sinful waste of money to pay our way
in.

Wi