ars has only tired my hand?

I picture myself seated with my family on the heights at Weehawken,
smoking a good cigarette, and musing on the affairs of nations as I
watch the flow of that superb river (as much finer than the Rhine, my
friend, as wine is finer than lagerbier!) which I have often, in days
gone by, admired and extolled by the hour.

I expect they will pleasantly call me Duke Hudson, and my son the Prince
of Staten Island. No matter. I can always face the Inevitable.

And that reminds me of the late war, in which the Inevitable that I was
always being called upon to face, was the Inevitable Prussian. But I
have faced much more terrible things. In your very city of Hoboken, I
have stood face to face with a German creditor! Will any one henceforth
doubt my fortitude?

I have one rather comforting reflection, apropos to that _rencontre._ I
have taken care to arm myself against future assaults of that nature. I
am Gold-Plated.

If your highly-gifted corps of artists should wish to depict me in a
connection which would satisfy my sense of honor, let them make a sketch
entitled: "The Two Exiles,"--one of whom may be,my Uncle at St. Helena;
the other, me, at Weehawken, with my family near, a glass of wine at my
side, a cigarette in one hand, and a copy of PUNCHINELLO in the other!

But let me not anticipate. Sufficient unto the day is the (d)evil
thereof.

Royally yours,

L. N.

* * * * *

Maxim for the next new President.

"A place for everybody, and everybody in his place."

* * * * *

[Illustration: ON COLOR.

_Cousin Bella, (admiring picture.)_ "HOW IS IT, FRED, THAT YOU PRODUCE
SUCH LOVELY COLOR, AND WITH SO MUCH FACILITY?"

_Fred, (thinking of his meerschaum.)_ "I DON'T TELL EVERYBODY THAT, YOU
INQUISITIVE TEASE, BUT FACT IS, I PUT THE STUMP OF AN OLD PAINT-BRUSH IN
THE BOWL, AND SMOKE THE OILIEST TOBACCO I CAN FIND."]

* * * * *

THE BATTLE AT SEDAN.

Special Correspondence of Punchinello.

(This paper is the only paper on the planet which has a correspondent at
the seat of war, wherever that seat may be. The following dispatch was
sent to us by cable at a total expense of $21,000.)

It was a still, calm night, the glorious moon was sailing through the
sky; the river was running water; the clouds were cloudy; the soldiers
were soldiering. I stepped out of my tent and tumbled over VON MOLTKE