favor upon solicitation.

But the business concluded, she thawed all in a moment, and invited the
gentlemen to luncheon with charming cordiality. Indeed, her genuine
_bonhomie_ after her affected indifference was rather comic. Everybody
was content. Champagne flowed. The lady, with her good mother-wit, kept
conversation going till the lawyer was nearly missing his next
appointment. He hurried away; and Sir Charles only lingered, out of
good-breeding, to bid Miss Somerset good-by. In the course of
leave-taking he said he was sorry he left her with people about her of
whom he had a bad opinion. "Those women have no more feeling for you
than stones. When you lay in convulsions, your housekeeper looked on as
philosophically as if you had been two kittens at play--you and Polly."

"I saw her."

"Indeed! You appeared hardly in a condition to see anything."

"I did, though, and heard the old wretch tell the young monkey to water
my lilac dress. That was to get it for her Polly. She knew I'd never
wear it afterward."

"Then why don't you turn her off?"

"Who'd take such a useless old hag, if I turned her off?"

"You carry a charity a long way."

"I carry everything. What's the use doing things by halves, good or
bad?"

"Well, but that Polly! She is young enough to get her living elsewhere;
and she is extremely disrespectful to you."

"That she is. If I wasn't a lady, I'd have given her a good hiding this
very day for her cheek!"

"Then why not turn her off this very day for her cheek?"

"Well, I'll tell you, since you and I are parted forever. No, I don't
like."

"Oh, come! No secrets between friends."

"Well, then, the old hag is--my mother."

"What?"

"And the young jade--is my sister."

"Good Heavens!"

"And the page--is my little brother."

"Ha, ha, ha!"

"What, you are not angry?"

"Angry? no. Ha, ha, ha!"

"See what a hornets' nest you have escaped from. My dear friend, those
two women rob me through thick and thin. They steal my handkerchiefs,
and my gloves, and my very linen. They drink my wine like fishes.
They'd take the hair off my head, if it wasn't fast by the roots--for a
wonder."

"Why not give them a ten-pound note and send them home?"

"They'd pocket the note, and blacken me in our village. That was why I
had them up here. First time I went home, after running about with that
little scamp, Vandeleur--do you know him?"

"I have not the honor."

"Then your luck beats mine. One